Ice Cream Man (2026)

Director: Eli Roth
Screenplay: Eli Roth, Noah Belson
Story: Eli Roth
Producer: Eli Roth, Kate Harrison Karman, Christopher Woodrow, Raj Singh
Cast: Ari Millen, Charlie Zeltzer, Shiloh O’Reilly, Kiori Mirza Waldman, Sarah Abbott, Benjamin Byron Davis
Cinematography: Simon Shohet
Editing: Matt Lyon
Score: Brandon Roberts
Genre: Slasher
Runtime: 86 minutes

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream!

Eli Roth serves up a scoop of luridness, topped with sprinkles of dark humour and drizzled with sheer bizarrity.

In the town of Bayleen Bay, the children are acting awfully peculiarly. The local ice cream man (the chilling Ari Millen) is to blame. One mouthful of his sweet treats puts the kids in a zombified state. In the middle of the night, the ice cream truck drives through the neighbourhood, awakening those who’ve scoffed the confectionery. They embark upon a grisly killing spree, slaughtering their respective parents and any adults in their path. It falls on our lactose intolerant hero (Charlie Zeltzer) and his friends to save the day.

There’s something so absurdly amusing about a horde of homicidal kids on a rampage, the colourful remnants of ice cream still stuck to their mouths. The whole thing is one supremely gory, campy, over-the-top sugar rush.

As much as I enjoyed it, there’s an aspect of ‘Ice Cream Man‘ that leaves me cold: Roth has employed the use of AI in Fleischer Studios-style sequences where traditional animation could’ve been used instead. I’m disappointed by the laziness of this decision. Real living artists are out of a job because of this corner-cutting. I don’t cone-done this practice whatsoever.

The movie won’t be to everyone’s tastes. If blood and guts isn’t your favourite flavour, then be glad the runtime is short and sweet, clocking in at 86 minutes. A sugary ending is not guaranteed.

My rating: 6 / 10

The Sheep Detectives (2026)

Director: Kyle Balda
Screenplay: Craig Mazin
Based on: ‘Three Bags Full: A Sheep Detective Story‘ by Leonie Swann
Cast: Hugh Jackman, Nicholas Braun, Nicholas Galitzine, Molly Gordon, Hong Chau, Emma Thompson, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Bryan Cranston, Chris O’Dowd, Regina Hall, Patrick Stewart, Bella Ramsey, Brett Goldstein
Cinematography: George Steel
Editing: Martin Walsh, Paul Machliss, Al LeVine
Score: Christophe Beck
Genre: Mystery comedy
Runtime: 109 minutes

A shepherd, George (Ewe Jackman – sorry, Hugh Jackman), lovingly looks after his flock. Every evening, he reads them murder mystery novels believing they, as special as they may be, are merely sheep, unable to understand these yarns. Their days gleefully roaming around the bucolic pasture come to a sudden halt as one morning, the sheep discover George’s body lying in the field. He’s been poisoned!

Lily, the smartest of the bunch, takes it upon herself to solve George’s murder by hook or by crook. She’s the bellwether, joined by Mopple (who has a good memory) and Sebastian (a loner and quite literally the black sheep of the flock). The residents of the local town of Denbrook fall under suspicion: a rival shepherd, a butcher, a priest, the innkeeper and George’s own daughter. Which one is a red herring? Who amongst them is a wolf in sheep’s clothing? Who’s acting unusually sheepish?

It’s family-friendly fare, with no injury detail or gruesomeness. The premise is shear silliness but I wasn’t exactly expecting anything highbrow here. The wool wasn’t pulled over my eyes. I’m sure kids will enjoy the slapstick feel and way-too-obvious jokes. Unsophisticated but three bags full of quaint English charm. A flock of celebs voice the woolly gang including Bryan Cranston, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Chris O’Dowd and Sir Patrick Stewart.

You won’t need to count sheep whilst watching; it keeps your attention and is surprisingly heartfelt when musing on mortality. It certainly wasn’t baaaad nor was I fleeced. Yes, you herd me correctly.

My rating: 6 / 10

The Amateur (2025)

Director: James Hawes
Screenplay: Ken Nolan, Gary Spinelli
Cast: Rami Malek, Rachel Brosnahan, Caitriona Balfe, Michael Stuhlbarg, Holt McCallany, Julianne Nicholson, Laurence Fishburne
Cinematography: Martin Ruhe
Editing: Jonathan Amos
Score: Volker Bertelmann
Genre: Vigilante action spy
Runtime: 123 minutes

Charlie (Rami Malek), a basement-dwelling CIA encryption nerd, is widowed when his wife Sarah (Rachel Brosnahan) is killed in a botched hostage situation during a terror attack at a London hotel. Uncovering workplace corruption on a higher level and knowing nothing will be done in regards to Sarah’s death, Charlie blackmails his superiors to give him basic field preparation in order to seek some retribution.

Blinded by grief, Charlie believes he has what it takes to avenge his spouse. “You couldn’t even beat a 90 year old nun in an arm wrestling match” he’s amusingly told at one point. He struggles to fire a loaded gun. He’s out of his depths. Not completely. He’s scrawny of build, but has the expertise and technology to surveil people and craft explosives. Picture Q undertaking the duties of James Bond. Underestimate weedy tech guys at your peril!

Obviously taking lives is wrong. But you can’t blame Charlie; he’s got this underdog quality; a minnow versus a shiver of sharks. I could not help rooting for him to succeed in his quest for vengeance in the face of unassailable odds.

This approach to the spy/action genre is refreshing. I counted only two short fight sequences (one of which Charlie features in) so overall it’s less brawling, more cat-and-mouse game-oriented, which makes it especially enthralling. Amateur (couple of) hour(s)? Absolutely not. Malek is a fine actor, perfectly cast as the unlikely action star, and there’s strong support from Laurence Fishburne as Charlie’s training mentor.

My rating: 8 / 10

Companion (2025)

Director: Drew Hancock
Screenplay: Drew Hancock
Cast: Sophie Thatcher, Jack Quaid, Lukas Gage, Megan Suri, Harvey Guillen, Rupert Friend
Cinematography: Eli Born
Editing: Brett W. Bachman, Josh Ethier
Score: Hrishikesh Hirway
Genre: Science fiction thriller
Runtime: 97 minutes

The opening sequence of ‘Companion‘ put me in mind of the last scene of ‘The Stepford Wives’; a young woman pushing a trolley down the aisle of a grocery store, everything seems a little too immaculate, there’s a heightened sense of reality. When the woman, Iris (Sophie Thatcher), locks eyes with Josh (Jack Quaid), there’s an instant spark between them.

Josh takes his new ‘girlfriend’ Iris with him on a trip to a lake house to meet his friends – the twist: she’s a companion robot. She’s designed to serve her owner; to satisfy their every whim. Anything they want – she must cater for. The concept really exposes the solipsism of human nature. Via a smartphone, the user can modify the bot’s intelligence level, eye colour, voice, language, and personality to suit their fancy. Ethically abhorrent.

Hold on a minute. He’s fucking an android? How does that even work…anatomically? Where does he insert his…? Josh gives me the ick, so my sympathies lie with Iris when the shit hits the fan. She’s not so docile; she bytes. And she’s not chuffed as (micro)chips to be kept as Josh’s personal robotic sex slave.

A gripping, wild ride (predictable in parts); it flips the script on the tired ‘robot malfunctions and goes berserk’ trope, giving the mistreated automaton a consciousness; something resembling humanity. The faulty wiring instead lies with humankind; their insatiable greed is the root of any chaos caused, rather than the blame being placed on ‘bad tech’ as usual.

My rating: 7 / 10

Strange Darling (2023)

Director: JT Mollner
Screenplay: JT Mollner
Producer: Bill Block, Chris Ivan Cevic, Roy Lee, Giovanni Ribisi, Steven Schneider
Cast: Willa Fitzgerald, Kyle Gallner, Barbara Hershey, Ed Begley Jr.
Cinematography: Giovanni Ribisi
Editing: Christopher Robin Bell
Score: Craig DeLeon
Genre: Psychological crime thriller
Runtime: 96 minutes

We’ve got 6 chapters in this story of a one-night stand gone wrong, they’re all jumbled up and out of sequence (apart from Chapter 6, which closes the tale). It concerns a hookup between a man (Kyle Gallner) and a woman (Willa Fitzgerald) that has dire consequences for both parties, but done so through an arthouse lens.

Movies that use nonlinear plots are taking a risk with the audience’s patience and comprehension – the clever ones can get away with it. This wasn’t inventive or distinct enough to pull this storytelling technique off however. It’s an attempt to do something artsy with a narrative about a serial killer (who may or may not be real, director JT Mollner is cagey on the inspiration in interviews).

Whilst initially engaging, with each chapter title card flashing up (accompanied by an excerpt of classical music), I grew a little weary. At the start, which – of course – is Chapter 3, we see Fitzgerald’s character (simply named ‘The Lady’) fleeing from a man (credited as ‘The Demon’, played by Gallner). Then comes Chapters 5, 1, 4, 2, then 6. The twisty plot means we don’t follow a simple path and this allows the whole story to be turned up on its head – but this didn’t land the blow it intended (I question everything) and I didn’t feel the characters were compelling enough for me to care about what happens to them. The dynamic between the duo was interesting in Chapter 1 and I liked the neon blue lighting of the motel they’ve parked outside of; the way the light flooded the car. Gallner does his best with the material he’s given but by the sixth chapter, Fitzgerald is slightly irritating, almost as much as the soppy soundtrack.

Strange Darling? More like strained, darling.

My rating: 5 / 10