Heads of State (2025)

Director: Ilya Naishuller
Screenplay: Josh Appelbaum, Andre Nemec, Harrison Query
Cast: Idris Elba, John Cena, Priyanka Chopra, Jack Quaid, Paddy Considine, Stephen Root, Carla Gugino
Cinematography: Ben Davis
Editing: Tom Harrison-Read
Score: Steven Price
Genre: Action comedy
Runtime: 113 minutes

I recently watched Idris Elba play the United States president in the tense thriller ‘A House of Dynamite‘, chronicling the hypothetical launch of a nuclear missile from an enemy nation. ‘Heads of State‘, however, is a full one-eighty in terms of tone. Light and breezy, it’s an acceptable antidote to a bleak and depressing world.

In this, Elba slips back into his native accent as Sam Clarke, the British prime minister while recently retired wrestler-turned-actor John Cena takes up the mantle of American president, as Will Derringer. Clarke’s no-nonsense gruffness conflicts with Derringer’s lack of formality – he’s an action movie star with no political experience propelled to public office by sheer popularity alone (because a situation like that has never happened before, right?). When Air Force One gets bombarded by missiles, the pair parachute to safety and land on Belarusian soil. They reluctantly join forces in order to get to their scheduled destination, a NATO summit in Trieste.

As for the plot: it’s of a paint-by-numbers quality; a Russian arms dealer baddie, a mole, fake-out deaths, explosions – nothing too taxing. The chalk and cheese duo verbally spar with each other when they’re not punching bad guys, ribbing one another on their transatlantic differences. The special relationship between the respective leaders of the Brits and the Yanks is the bromance you didn’t know you needed. Throw in Priyanka Chopra as an MI6 agent and Jack Quaid as a CIA officer and you’ve got an undemanding watch, suffused with corniness.

My Rating: 6 / 10

Wake Up Dead Man (2025)

Director: Rian Johnson
Screenplay: Rian Johnson
Cast: Daniel Craig, Josh O’Connor, Glenn Close, Josh Brolin, Mila Kunis, Jeremy Renner, Kerry Washington, Andrew Scott, Cailee Spaeny, Daryl McCormack, Thomas Haden Church
Cinematography: Steve Yedlin
Editing: Bob Ducsay
Score: Nathan Johnson
Genre: Mystery
Runtime: 144 minutes

I must confess: I’m not a fan of the ‘Knives Out‘ series. This third entry, ‘Wake Up Dead Man‘, is slightly better than the first two films but that’s not saying a lot.

After assaulting a deacon, a young priest, Jud (Josh O’Connor), is relocated to a small parish under the thumb of the fearsome Monsignor Jefferson Wicks (Josh Brolin). Wicks’ sermons from the pulpit strike terror into the hearts of his congregation. Jud, a former boxer who’s seen the light, preaches love, not war. When Wicks dies in seemingly impossible circumstances, Jud is the prime suspect.

He’s really the only suspect though. There’s an all-star cast yet most of them aren’t utilised like they deserve to be. Josh O’Connor is tremendous; he features in a greater capacity than Daniel Craig’s Detective Blanc. The story, a classic locked door mystery, is more about Jud’s quest to clear his name without the need for Blanc entirely. In fact, when the detective entered the house of God and bellowed “Hello” in his Southern drawl a good chunk into the runtime, I audibly groaned.

For such a weighty subject matter, religion is weaved into the narrative the proper amount. With making each Benoit Blanc case stand out visually and tonally (‘Knives Out”s stately home, ‘Glass Onion”s luxury island), the church and its pageantry could just have been a game of dress up – cassocks as mere costumes, the holy building a backdrop while clues are scoured for. The conversation between Blanc and Jud on how the religious parables found in the Bible is another form of storytelling was interesting.

And as stories go, this one is full of pomposity. I predicted as much when I started watching; Rian Johnson isn’t a miracle worker. No Hail Marys could convince me otherwise.

My rating: 5 / 10

Jay Kelly (2025)

Director: Noah Baumbach
Screenplay: Noah Baumbach, Emily Mortimer
Cast: George Clooney, Adam Sandler, Laura Dern, Billy Crudup
Cinematography: Linus Sandgren
Editing: Valerio Bonelli, Rachel Durance
Score: Nicholas Britell
Genre: Comedy-drama
Runtime: 132 minutes

Jay Kelly. A quick three syllable name, repeated often enough that you almost forget he’s a man, not a concept. George Clooney stars as the titular actor, at the apex of a decades-long career as a leading man. At the funeral of the director who gave him his big break, everyone assumes he’s doing fine, like being rich and famous cancels out any emotions someone has. In reality, he’s a shell of a human being with no authentic identity of his own.

He’s divorced, estranged from one daughter and trying to salvage the relationship he has with his younger daughter. She’s going travelling across Europe, leaving him alone with no genuine friends. He decides to track her journey by using her friend’s credit card data, even if it means having to rough it on a train full of normal people. Unfamous people.

They’re surprised to see him in such an ordinary scenario. And of course, treat him like a god among men. That’s the thing about fame though, only those at the eye of the storm know just how destructive a force it is. Here’s Jay Kelly, with a wrecked domestic life, celebrating with complete strangers in a train carriage. They are outsiders, with no knowledge of who he is as a living, breathing person. They’re praising a name; he’s a visual representation of heroism as if his roles onscreen have bled out into the real world.

It takes a small army to construct the image of the perfect film star – his publicist, his stylist, his assistant, reinforcing the idea that he’s a project to work on. With him every step of the way is his manager Ron (Adam Sandler), too loyal to resign even with his own family situation reaching breaking point, getting too close to the squall of celebrity.

Clooney conveys Baumbach’s ideas of fame successfully. He’s never been my favourite ever actor but he’s the only one that could fill this role. He is one of the last great movie stars. His polished charm harks back to the glamour of the Golden Age of Hollywood. Jay Kelly, in a moment of self doubt, rattles off a list of classic actors – Gary Cooper, Cary Grant, Clark Gable – inserting his own name in there, as if to assure himself of his place amongst the greats. George Clooney easily belongs in that list. His peers in the field are bankable yet he has that sense of maturity about him. Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise and Leonardo DiCaprio are bona fide icons but they’re all too boyish, clinging onto some sort of youth when they’re over half a century old.

There’s a scene that sees Jay Kelly running through a forest dressed in a white suit reminiscent of a unicorn – magical, mystical, legendary.

My rating: 8 / 10

A House of Dynamite (2025)

Director: Kathryn Bigelow
Screenplay: Noah Oppenheim
Cast: Idris Elba, Rebecca Ferguson, Gabriel Basso, Jared Harris, Tracy Letts
Cinematography: Barry Ackroyd
Editing: Kirk Baxter
Score: Volker Bertelmann
Genre: Apocalyptic political thriller
Runtime: 112 minutes

We’re living in a world on a knife edge; nine countries possess nuclear weapons and have the capability to annihilate an opposing nation. From an American viewpoint, the most likely candidates for launching an attack against them are China, Russia or North Korea.

A chilling scenario plays out: at Fort Greely, Alaska, radars detect an intercontinental ballistic missile heading across the Pacific Ocean. We’re thrust into the frenzy of the White House Situation Room as the events unfold at an alarming speed. The missile is on course to hit Chicago, wiping out millions upon millions of civilians. The members of staff in the Situation Room have prepared for this eventuality a thousand times but when training becomes a reality, the panic sets in.

Less than 20 minutes till the Windy City is blown away, a conference call is arranged between the Situation Room, the Pentagon and commanders of the Armed Forces, joined by the Secretary of Defense and the President himself (Idris Elba). With the perpetrator unknown, the leader of the free world is put in an impossible position: does he launch a preemptive strike on enemy bases or risk more inbound missiles decimating cities?

None of the key players are one-dimensional characters. Everyone has a family of sorts, whether it be a pregnant partner, a young child or a detached relationship with a daughter. The story never deviates from the impending crisis yet these little glimpses into the interpersonal help to fully realise what could just be faceless identities rushing around.

Told in three chapters each from a different perspective, Kathryn Bigelow’s fictional portrayal of the United States government’s worst nightmare emanates tension right up until the last moment.

My rating: 7 / 10

The Woman in Cabin 10 (2025)

Director: Simon Stone
Screenplay: Joe Shrapnel, Anna Waterhouse, Simon Stone
Cast: Keira Knightley, Guy Pearce, David Ajala, Art Malik
Cinematography: Ben Davis
Editing: Katie Weiland, Mark Day
Score: Benjamin Wallfisch
Genre: Psychological thriller
Runtime: 95 minutes

A notable journalist, Laura (Keira Knightley), is invited on a cruise aboard a luxury yacht by a dying billionaire. She accepts the invite, needing to clear her mind after witnessing the murder of the source of a previous article, and also because the terminally ill philanthropist has set up a new charity worth covering.

During Laura’s first night on the superyacht, she overhears an argument coming from the neighbouring cabin. Then a splash. Laura peeks her head over the railing and thinks she’s seen someone in the water. Adamant that that’s the case, Laura refuses to let it go, quickly becoming the pariah among the other guests as she hunts for the truth. Her recent trauma is brought up as an excuse for her behaviour, a prime example of gaslighting.

It’s not just Laura who is the victim of being gaslit; it’s us viewers too. The twist in the tale is so ridiculous it’s insulting. One could argue that none of the characters are attuned to the surrounding events as they’re too self-absorbed. My eyes were glued to the screen for the build-up but the more I watched, and thought about afterwards, the more points I want to deduct from my rating. This seafaring ‘The Lady Vanishes‘ has a plothole so huge, it threatens to sink the boat.

Most of the big name cast feel like they’re there to fill a contractual obligation. Hannah Waddingham, David Morrissey and Kaya Scodelario appear onscreen for a scant amount of minutes, as does Gugu Mbatha-Raw, bookending the film as Laura’s boss.

Maybe Laura did see something hurled overboard – it was me, escaping such fatuousness.

My rating: 5 / 10

Predator: Badlands (2025)

Director: Dan Trachtenberg
Screenplay: Patrick Aison
Cast: Elle Fanning, Dimitrius Schuster-Koloamatangi
Cinematography: Jeff Cutter
Editing: Stefan Grube, David Trachtenberg
Score: Sarah Schachner, Benjamin Wallfisch
Genre: Science fiction action
Runtime: 107 minutes

Making an iconic antagonist the hero of the tale is a risky move. It’s presumably been done to invigorate the decades-old franchise; after the initial few ‘group of soldiers vs. invisible hunter’ movies, the audience grows weary. Dan Trachtenberg is responsible for taking the ‘Predator‘ series in bold directions – first with ‘Prey‘, which pitted a young Comanche woman against the creature, and more recently, ‘Predator: Killer of Killers‘, an animated anthology film.

This new move does the inverse of what he’d hoped. The species, named the Yautja, are known for their bloodthirsty trophy hunting. An exploration of their personal history and lore would indeed be refreshing yet this choice to make one of their own the protagonist feels strange. Dek, the runt of the litter, heads to the deadly planet of Genna on a mission to slay the gargantuan Kalisk to win the approval of his father and join the clan. He’s almost too humanoid if that was possible. Still grotesque facially but less threatening. And his personality: unflinching at the start of his quest which softens as the story progresses.

I’m not saying the Yautja are emotionless creatures, they’re just not meant to be overly sentimental – they kill for the fun of it for heaven’s sake. Dek is the standard example of a Disneyfied character – sympathetic beyond the point of belief. The Yautja are friends to none and predators to all. So why does Dek team up with the synthetic Thia (Elle Fanning)?

Writing aside, the backdrop of the homeworld Yautja Prime at the beginning is stellar and the red laser swords are striking. Setting further ‘Predator‘ stories in outer space, away from the denizens of Earth allows for future run-ins with the Weyland-Yutani Corporation.

My rating: 5 / 10

Bugonia (2025)

Director: Yorgos Lanthimos
Screenplay: Will Tracy
Cast: Emma Stone, Jesse Plemons, Aidan Delbis
Cinematography: Robbie Ryan
Editing: Yorgos Mavropsaridis
Score: Jerskin Fendrix
Genre: Absurdist black comedy thriller
Runtime: 118 minutes

Two men, Teddy (Jesse Plemons) and his cousin Don (Aidan Delbis), hatch a plan to kidnap the CEO of a pharmaceutical corporation, believing she is an alien from the Andromeda galaxy. Yes, really. Said CEO, Michelle (Emma Stone), initially puts up a fight but luck is not on her side. Taking her back to their house, the guys buzz her hair off and slather her in antihistamine cream to stop her beaming a distress signal to her mothership. They’ve thought this through, haven’t they? In this getup, Michelle does indeed look like an extraterrestrial; bald-headed and pasty-skinned.

It shows you how deep down the rabbit hole these men have fallen. They may as well be in Wonderland. Reaching the apex of delusion, they’ve gone so far as to chemically castrate themselves to block out ‘psychic compulsions’. Teddy is the brains of the operation, if you could recognise any intelligence in him whatsoever. Don, who is intellectually disabled, is coerced every step of the way by his cousin; the latter has total control of the situation.

According to Teddy, the aliens are responsible for the dwindling number of bees (he’s an apiarist) and that they’re trying to wipe out human life by eradicating our food supply.

Though billed as a black comedy, there’s an undercurrent of ghastliness one cannot get past. The pair shackle Michelle in their basement; she has no escape from their lunacy. Teddy slaps her and electrocutes her. This is torture. Interestingly, ‘Bugonia‘ is the gender-swapped remake of the South Korean film ‘Save the Green Planet!‘ and by making our CEO a female adds to the imbalance of the sexes. Here we have a once powerful woman who’s graced the covers of Time and Vogue now chained up in a some greasy-haired guy’s cellar.

It speaks to the larger problem facing society – the class war. While Teddy is a blue-collar worker toiling away, Michelle’s existence is one of privilege. The idea that endangering people in positions of power can help to address the divide between economic factions is reminiscent of the recent death of a certain health insurance executive. The men are convinced that they’re the little guys, being screwed over by big businesses. Powerless and hopeless in the face of something bigger than they will ever amount to.

Without saying too much, the last ten minutes are pivotal. The overarching environmental message is reinforced by an indelible sequence that necessitates action on our part, us humans.

My rating: 9 / 10

Frankenstein (2025)

Director: Guillermo del Toro
Screenplay: Guillermo del Toro
Cast: Oscar Isaac, Jacob Elordi, Mia Goth, Christoph Waltz, Christian Convery, Charles Dance, David Bradley, Lars Mikkelsen
Cinematography: Dan Laustsen
Editing: Evan Schiff
Score: Alexandre Desplat
Genre: Gothic science fiction
Runtime: 150 minutes

If Maggie Gyllenhaal’s ‘The Bride!‘ had released upon its original scheduled date, we’d have not one, but two Frankenstein films to devour in quick succession. It’s since been pushed back to next March, allowing Guillermo del Toro’s version some space to make its mark. How fitting it is that Mary Shelley’s tale of regeneration should have a resurgence of its own, a couple of centuries on.

This adaptation is far more in line with Shelley’s novel than any Universal Pictures monster flick. Here, the creature (often erroneously named after his creator) is imbued with thought and the capability to grow intellectually. He can speak, only single words at first, but he’s a smarter being than the stereotypical grunting green-faced brute of yore. Baron Frankenstein’s (Oscar Isaac) character is also given depth and reasoning. His unflagging quest to resurrect the deceased is borne from the grief of losing his beloved mother in his childhood, accompanied by a desire to scientifically supersede his bully of a father, a notable physician.

Oscar Isaac and Mia Goth give fine performances; Isaac capturing Baron Frankenstein’s descent into madness. I’m not sold on the casting of heartthrob Jacob Elordi as Frankenstein’s creation. Our sympathies lie with the creature, chained and shackled in the basement of the scientist’s lab yet with the narrative so emotionally-driven, I can’t find enough of that necessary anguish in Elordi’s portrayal. I have issues with his design too; he’s too aesthetically pleasing for something that’s a shoddy patchwork of rotten flesh.

Del Toro brings the classic story to life with his sumptuous visuals, his penchant for bloodshed and a supernatural feel to it; he’s made Frankenstein’s creature immortal – impervious to bullets, bayonets and even a stick of dynamite. Did the reassembled body parts once belong to Chuck Norris?

My rating: 6 / 10

Good Fortune (2025)

Director: Aziz Ansari
Screenplay: Aziz Ansari
Cast: Seth Rogen, Aziz Ansari, Keanu Reeves, Keke Palmer, Sandra Oh
Cinematography: Adam Newport-Berra
Editing: Daniel Haworth
Score: Carter Burwell
Genre: Supernatural comedy
Runtime: 97 minutes

In ‘Good Fortune‘, Keanu Reeves plays an angel. This role seems perfect for him; he’s cultivated an image as Hollywood’s nice guy – considerate, polite and wholly unproblematic in such a toxic environment. It’s a shame that he’s brought plummeting back to Earth by his appearance in this dud.

Reeves is Gabriel, an angel assigned to prevent people from texting and driving (and ultimately crashing). He’s a ‘budget guardian angel’, his wings noticeably shorter than his fellow angels. Feeling unfulfilled, he goes above and beyond his pay grade to help Arj (Aziz Ansari), a documentary maker who is down on his luck. Arj struggles to get by financially – he’s resorted to sleeping in his car and working any odd job he can. By complete contrast, we have Jeff (Seth Rogen), a tech bro who sits in the lap of luxury. Gabriel, using his limited powers, switches the lives of the men in a bid to show Arj that being so affluent isn’t all what it appears to be and that his life, however pitiful it may seem, is still worth living.

Naturally Arj, exposed to funds he could only dream of, refuses to swap back. Thus, Gabriel’s superiors strip him of his wings, rendering him human. He and Jeff must scrape together an income on the streets. The film is ‘It’s a Wonderful Life‘ minus the charm. Ansari, who also directs and wrote the screenplay, attempts to deliver a message about the financial disparities existing in America yet none of it elicits my sympathy.

I can’t cast anybody involved in a positive light. Rogen and the whiny-voiced Ansari are irritating, and (god bless him) Mr. Reeves can’t impart any angelic profundities without them sounding stilted. The movie isn’t so much as sent from above as sent from below.

Good fortune? Misfortune would be more apt.

My rating: 4 / 10

The Thursday Murder Club (2025)

Director: Chris Columbus
Screenplay: Katy Brand, Suzanne Heathcote
Cast: Helen Mirren, Pierce Brosnan, Ben Kingsley, Celia Imrie
Cinematography: Don Burgess
Editing: Dan Zimmerman
Score: Thomas Newman
Genre: Crime comedy
Runtime: 118 minutes

We may as well make American director Chris Columbus an honorary Brit. He was responsible for launching the ‘Harry Potter‘ cinematic franchise, helming its first two films to critical acclaim. Now, he returns to Blighty to adapt television presenter-cum-author Richard Osman’s debut novel, ‘The Thursday Murder Club‘.

A quartet of pensioners set out to solve a murder, all the while trying to save their retirement home from being sold and redeveloped into flats. You might be mistaken for thinking these elderly amateur sleuths are over the hill. How wrong you’d be. They’re sharp as a tack and rely on the skills their respective former careers have honed. You can’t teach an old dog new tricks. Well, these four have all the tricks up their sleeves.

A plenitude of great British actors grace our screen: Helen Mirren, Ben Kingsley, Celia Imrie and Pierce Brosnan comprise the members of the titular club, whilst Naomi Ackie, David Tennant, Jonathan Pryce and Richard E. Grant round off the cast.

It’s an absolute delight from start to finish. The murder case isn’t dumbed down akin to a cozy ITV afternoon drama nor is it needlessly complex like a Harlan Coben story. It’s riveting, often hilarious and any loose ends are wrapped up nice and neat.

I can’t wait for their next mystery. This film was a Netflix Original and you know the speed in which they yield content. The actors are game so why not get cracking on the sequel as Osman has written further installments since.

My rating: 8 / 10

Roofman (2025)

Director: Derek Cianfrance
Screenplay: Derek Cianfrance, Kirt Gunn
Cast: Channing Tatum, Kirsten Dunst, Peter Dinklage, LaKeith Stanfield, Juno Temple, Ben Mendelsohn
Cinematography: Andrij Parekh
Editing: Jim Helton, Ron Patane
Score: Christopher Bear
Genre: Crime comedy
Runtime: 126 minutes

I went into ‘Roofman‘ with a vague recollection of Jeffrey Manchester’s criminal exploits – he conducted a string of armed robberies, usually targeting McDonald’s joints. The alias ‘Roofman’ came from Manchester’s method of climbing atop the buildings at night, drilling a hole through the roof to gain access to the bathrooms then robbing the cash registers, giving the early morning staff the fright of their lives.

In a turn of events you couldn’t invent, Manchester gets caught, manages to abscond from prison, and in a bid to lay low, hides out in a Toys “R” Us. When the whimsical score began, I immediately thought the treatment of this real-life figure would be a bit breezy. It’s played for laughs – given the outlandish situation, it would be hard not to.

I was won over. Channing Tatum does a great job of making Manchester into an affable anti-hero. He’s not a bad guy at his core; he just wants to provide for his children and is strapped for cash. The decisions he’s made are disastrous yet you can’t help rooting for him to evade capture. Haven’t you always wanted to stay past closing time in a department store? The sequences involving Jeffrey’s nocturnal antics on the shop floor are a lot of fun.

The film packs an unexpected emotional punch in the form of the surrogate family Jeffrey forms with Toys “R” Us employee and love interest, Leigh (Kirsten Dunst), and her two daughters. He can’t return to his old world – that’s gone forever. Someone in his shoes getting a second chance to build a life for themselves is rare, and it’s one that is so precarious.

My rating: 8 / 10

A Big Bold Beautiful Journey (2025)

Director: Kogonada
Screenplay: Seth Reiss
Cast: Margot Robbie, Colin Farrell, Kevin Kline, Phoebe Waller-Bridge
Cinematography: Benjamin Loeb
Editing: Susan E. Kim, Jonathan Alberts
Score: Joe Hisaishi
Genre: Romantic fantasy
Runtime: 109 minutes

If you came upon a door randomly placed in the middle of the woods, would you enter through it? What lies behind it?

I would, anticipating some kind of magical occurrence. Anyone curious enough to go on ‘A Big Bold Beautiful Journey‘ will find nothing more than charm-free, paper-thin nonsense.

Two strangers, David (Colin Farrell) and Sarah (Margot Robbie) are thrust together by faux-quirky circumstances wherein the GPS system in the car David is renting instructs him to collect Sarah, who he only met the day before at a wedding. The HAL 9000-like computer encourages them to drive across the countryside from one location to the next, where they encounter doors that open up to formative moments in their lives.

It’s pretty to look at; Kogonada’s use of primary colours is easy on the eye. Don’t blame him for the weak screenplay though. Aiming for something meaningful, the writing is full of puddle-deep platitudes. Farrell and Robbie are talented individually yet their characters don’t fit together at all. The romance developing between them wouldn’t work in the real world. This is a fantasy – or is that just an excuse to throw conflicting forces at each other, confidently declaring that it’s a successful union.

If my GPS started telling me to pick up random women, I’d rip it out my vehicle and launch it out the window. “Open the pod bay doors, HAL”. Perhaps, instead, we should close them and drive off.

My rating: 5 / 10

One Battle After Another (2025)

Director: Paul Thomas Anderson
Screenplay: Paul Thomas Anderson
Cast: Leonardo DiCaprio, Sean Penn, Benicio del Toro, Regina Hall, Teyana Taylor, Chase Infiniti
Cinematography: Michael Bauman
Editing: Andy Jurgensen
Score: Jonny Greenwood
Genre: Black comedy action thriller
Runtime: 162 minutes

Paul Thomas Anderson’s latest project, ‘One Battle After Another‘, encapsulates everything going on in present-day America. The opening chapter, set sixteen years ago, shows us a regime change does nothing to solve the issue of mass immigration and border control. And now in 2025, with Donald Trump retaking his seat in the Oval Office and recent politically motivated shootings, the country is a tinderbox waiting for someone to light the fuse.

In this work of fiction, Leonardo DiCaprio plays Pat Calhoun, a left-wing revolutionary helping to liberate undocumented migrants from a detention centre. He’s got noble intentions but the group he’s part of, the ‘French 75’, blow up offices and banks. You might call them freedom fighters, I say they’re domestic terrorists.

The film doesn’t glorify radical protesting free from repercussions. A member of the French 75, the fiery Perfidia (Teyana Taylor), Pat’s partner, falls pregnant. She’s hardly a contender for mother of the year; as soon as she’s had the baby, she’s resuming her criminal activities. A botched mission later, she gets caught by the cops. In exchange for not being thrown in a jail cell, she rats her fellow comrades out. One single selfish decision. This jeopardises Pat and their little girl so while Perfidia absconds to Mexico, dad and daughter live off-grid in perpetual paranoia. Sixteen years pass, she’s a teenager without a mum and he’s a jaded wreck.

If anything, ‘One Battle After Another‘ is less of a political statement, more of a paternity drama. DiCaprio gives a commanding performance as a father desperately trying to look after the daughter born into a world she didn’t choose to be part of but was thrust into against her will. Perhaps that’s the truest battle. Pat’s heroic paternal quest is an idea everyone can get behind, the topic of immigration aside.

Supporting actors Benicio del Toro and Sean Penn pull their weight; del Toro as a karate sensei and Penn as a colonel whose fetish for black women puts him at odds with the white supremacist association he longs to join. Anderson’s strong visuals and Jonny Greenwood’s score cement this as a relevant modern-day epic.

My rating: 7 / 10

The Long Walk (2025)

Director: Francis Lawrence
Screenplay: JT Mollner
Cast: Cooper Hoffman, David Jonsson, Garrett Wareing, Tut Nyuot, Charlie Plummer, Ben Wang, Roman Griffin Davis, Jordan Gonzalez, Josh Hamilton, Judy Greer, Mark Hamill
Cinematography: Jo Willems
Editing: Mark Yoshikawa
Score: Jeremiah Fraites
Genre: Dystopian survival thriller
Runtime: 108 minutes

Another month, another Stephen King adaptation.

After the muddled fantasy that was ‘The Life of Chuck‘, we’re back on solid ground with a horror-adjacent concept. It’s a step in the right direction.

In an America stricken by poverty and under the thumb of a totalitarian regime, a group of young men enter a competition: the titular long walk. There is no finish line in sight. The victor is the last man standing (or walking in this case). They’ve voluntarily submitted to this arduous challenge to win ‘the prize’: anything their heart desires. In many cases, it’s cash – conditions are so poor economically by staying home and sitting it out, you’d probably die of starvation anyway.

The walkers are required to travel at a speed of three miles per hour consistently. Water is supplied along the way. No stopping for a quick doze though. Absolutely no time for a toilet break either. Audiences won’t need one; the film keeps you glued to the comfort of your seat.

The boys are given three warnings if they lag behind. They aren’t excluded from the expedition if they fail to keep up with the crowd. Instead, they’re shot dead, cold and mercilessly; the corpse just left there to bleed out. It’s part of the routine. With each walker meeting his maker, it doesn’t get easier down the road.

Nobody is there to make friends upon entering the contest although a few gang together and call themselves the Musketeers. All for one and one for all. There can only be one winner.

Doyen of dystopia Francis Lawrence, known for directing nearly every ‘The Hunger Games‘ movie, maintains a steady pace. The cast is top-class; Cooper Hoffman, David Jonsson, Charlie Plummer and an unrecognisable Mark Hamill as the Major, dark sunglasses stuck to his face. The eyes are the window of the soul. Their absence epitomises a country lacking any humanity, where unfortunate men are slain without a pause for reflection.

‘The Long Walk‘ is soul-crushingly bleak – stick with it to the end even if, like the walkers, your resolve is broken.

My rating: 8 / 10

Honey Don’t! (2025)

Director: Ethan Coen
Screenplay: Ethan Coen, Tricia Cooke
Cast: Margaret Qualley, Aubrey Plaza, Chris Evans, Charlie Day
Cinematography: Ari Wegner
Editing: Tricia Cooke, Emily Denker
Score: Carter Burwell
Genre: Neo-noir dark comedy detective
Runtime: 89 minutes

‘Honey Don’t!‘ is the middle entry in a ‘lesbian B-movie trilogy’ (their words, not mine) from director Ethan Coen and his writing partner / wife Tricia Cooke. Last year’s ‘Drive-Away Dolls‘ was a crime-infused road movie, this film keeps the criminal element intact but has the feel of an old-school detective yarn.

It’s as far removed from the Coen brothers’ ‘Fargo‘ as you’d imagine. Wintry Minnesota is swapped for Bakersfield, California, where there’s nary a tree to be seen for miles. Lead character Honey O’Donahue (Margaret Qualley), a private detective, is the antithesis of Frances McDormand’s police chief Marge Gunderson. Marge was a homely, maternal figure whereas Honey is hedonistic and sensual.

Having hived off from his brother, Ethan’s project is gushing with gratuitous sexual content. One might instantly write off any female nudity depicted as having been included for ‘the male gaze’. Not so, I’d say it might appeal to same-sex attracted women more. The hot-bloodedness left me cold, the sticky bedroom scenes not doing anything to drive the plot forward.

Honey is busy as a bee investigating a car crash, a cult-like church and the disappearance of her niece while still having time to hook up with a cop (Aubrey Plaza).

Coen’s strong cinematic visuals are buzzworthy; the sequences with Honey driving in her open-top automobile down the neglected West Coast streets keeping us sweet when the narrative veers off course. Margaret Qualley is outstanding, fully understanding the assignment given. Chris Evans as the lecherous preacher surprised me, playing against his all-American good guy type.

Not quite the bee’s knees but not a total buzzkill either.

My rating: 6 / 10

Caught Stealing (2025)

Director: Darren Aronofsky
Screenplay: Charlie Huston
Cast: Austin Butler, Regina King, Zoë Kravitz, Matt Smith, Liev Schreiber, Vincent D’Onofrio
Cinematography: Matthew Libatique
Editing: Andrew Weisblum
Score: Rob Simonsen
Genre: Black comedy crime thriller
Runtime: 107 minutes

A once promising young baseball star, Henry ‘Hank’ Thompson (Austin Butler), finds himself in all sorts of trouble when he gets involved with unpleasant criminals in New York City. His West Coast sports career derailed in a car accident, Hank now works as a bartender, still haunted by the crash that crushed his dreams.

Hank is tasked with looking after his British punk revivalist neighbour Russ (Matt Smith)’s cat while the latter is visiting his dying father in his homeland. Two nasty Russian cronies come knocking on Russ’ door – Hank, refusing to tell the thugs anything, is left without a kidney following a savage beating from the pair. Hank is down to his last out. The Russians are hounding him for information about Russ’ whereabouts and he’s being pursued by a couple of gun-toting Jewish gangsters. Caught in the crossfire, Hank must do what he can to survive.

Darren Aronofsky paints a gritty picture of Manhattan’s Lower East Side in the late 1990s; the grime and violence exuding from the screen. You can feel the buzz of imminent danger crackling from around every corner. The big city ain’t so pretty. The attempts to gentrify the area have failed; the underbelly of dodgy drug dealers and corrupt cops lingers on.

Butler and Regina King (playing a narcotics detective) knock it out the park with their performances. Aronofsky steps up to the plate and scores a home run with ‘Caught Stealing‘. Buckle up – this is one wild ride.

My rating: 8 / 10

The Roses (2025)

Director: Jay Roach
Screenwriter: Tony McNamara
Cast: Benedict Cumberbatch, Olivia Colman, Andy Samberg, Kate McKinnon, Allison Janney
Cinematography: Florian Hoffmeister
Editing: Jon Poll
Score: Theodore Shapiro
Genre: Satirical black comedy
Runtime: 105 minutes

Warren Adler’s novel ‘The War of the Roses‘ has been adapted twice; the first time had Michael Douglas and Kathleen Turner at each other’s throats. Now, it’s the turn of Benedict Cumberbatch and Olivia Colman to stand toe-to-toe. Two British actors in a sea of American accents. It couldn’t work better; the Brits are so good at delivering barbed witticisms compared to their cousins across the pond. Dropping the ‘The War of‘ prefix doesn’t guarantee a gentler look at a couple’s relationship – a rose by any other name.

Married for a decade and the parents of two kids (more American accents), Theo (Cumberbatch) and Ivy Rose (Colman) are at opposite ends of the spectrum work-wise. Theo is a successful architect while Ivy’s restaurant struggles to attract customers. One freak Californian storm changes everything. Theo’s devoted wife becomes a thorn in his side when her eatery blows up with popularity overnight. She’s in full bloom, he’s wilting after a building he designed is totally destroyed and he’s blacklisted. Unable to keep his fragile male ego in check, his simmering resentment of Ivy boils over.

The petals start falling off; the pair go from petty squabbles to an embarrassingly unsubtle dinner party fuelled by a gallon of alcohol. Never has the disintegration of someone’s marriage been so wickedly humorous. Cumberbatch and Colman are excellently matched as the warring spouses, bolstered by Tony McNamara’s biting screenplay. They don’t sell the idea of matrimony being a bed of roses but what a sparring match it is to behold.

My rating: 8 / 10

The Life of Chuck (2024)

Director: Mike Flanagan
Screenplay: Mike Flanagan
Cast: Tom Hiddleston, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Karen Gillan, Mia Sara, Carl Lumbly, Benjamin Pajak, Jacob Tremblay, Mark Hamill
Cinematography: Eben Bolter
Editing: Mike Flanagan
Score: The Newton Brothers
Genre: Fantasy drama
Runtime: 111 minutes

If I told you this was a Stephen King cinematic adaptation, you’d think it would be classed in the horror genre, right? Wrong answer: it’s one of King’s forays into fantasy. ‘The Life of Chuck‘ is a short story contained in his 2020 collection ‘If It Bleeds‘ (another such tale, ‘Mr. Harrigan’s Phone‘ has already been adapted).

It’s the end of the world as we know it. Nobody feels fine though. Chunks of America are lost to earthquakes and sinkholes, the internet goes down and there’s reports of flooding from around the globe. Even the stars start to vanish from the night sky. There is a constant throughout this apocalyptic scenario: billboards that proclaim: “Charles Krantz: 39 Great Years! Thanks, Chuck!”.

If you keep watching, (almost) all will be revealed. This is Act Three – we’re seeing Chuck’s life unfold backwards. Starting the narrative with the demise of everything signifies we’ve experienced the climax early. The remainder meanders along. Stretching 128 pages into a feature-length film means a fair bit of what is seen on screens could be chucked away, including an extended dance number featuring the adult Chuck (Tom Hiddleston).

This is Mike Flanagan’s third adaptation of a Stephen King plot, following ‘Gerald’s Game‘ and ‘Doctor Sleep‘. He’s clearly a fan but couldn’t he choose a story to interpret that wasn’t so ponderous?

Nonetheless, Chiwetel Ejiofor and Mark Hamill provide strong performances and the young actor playing 11-year-old Chuck, Benjamin Pajak, has serious dance moves. Dare I say this, but perhaps Mr. King should stick to doing what he does best: scaring the wits out of us?

My rating: 5 / 10

Together (2025)

Director: Michael Shanks
Screenplay: Michael Shanks
Cast: Dave Franco, Alison Brie, Damon Herriman
Cinematography: Germain McMicking
Editing: Sean Lahiff
Score: Cornel Wilczek
Genre: Supernatural body horror
Runtime: 102 minutes

Real life married pair Dave Franco and Alison Brie star as a couple whose relocation from the big city to the countryside doesn’t exactly go smoothly. Millie (Brie) is the driving force behind the move but her boyfriend Tim (Franco) is more reluctant to uproot their lives. She finds work as a teacher at the local school; he’s struggling to find success as a musician at 35 years old. He’s got a fledgling mullet like he’s trying to be a dumb hipster, for goodness sake. We know who wears the trousers in that household.

While out exploring their new habitat, the couple take a tumble down a hole into an underground cave. Thirsty, Tim drinks from a pool of water, thinking it’s regular, potable liquid. Unaware of its potency, this water creates in Tim an unstoppable magnetism towards Millie against his will. His body convulses in the shower as if he’s having a panic attack. His dependence on Millie heightened, it reaches the point where he’s turning up at her workplace in a sexually charged stupor, little control over his limbs.

‘Together’ is a statement about finding your twin flame. The person who completes you, the one you share the deepest connection with, preferably not literally. The film is intimate and frequently gross; much like you’d expect a relationship to be. For the most part, the idea of physical symbiosis works well in a horror setting yet I found it too silly in places. Watch this with your better half – don’t sit too closely though.

My rating: 6 / 10

Materialists (2025)

Director: Celine Song
Screenplay: Celine Song
Cast: Dakota Johnson, Chris Evans, Pedro Pascal
Cinematography: Shabier Kirchner
Editing: Keith Fraase
Score: Daniel Pemberton
Genre: Romantic comedy-drama
Runtime: 117 minutes

In Celine Song’s sophomore outing as a director/writer, she takes the mating dance that is 21st century dating and examines it with laser sharp precision. Love is the easy part, finding your perfect match is where the difficulty lies.

Lucy (Dakota Johnson) is professional matchmaker. The concept seems out of step with the multitudinous dating apps available, where users can pick prospective partners with one swipe of a finger. She’s a physical presence, a comforting face amidst the woes of rejection. A middleman in her industry, acting as a therapist of sorts to her clientiele. Her role is to assign these people the soulmate of their dreams, determined by a similar financial situation, political leaning and attractiveness. Height is crucial too: the taller the man, the greater the value. So much for short kings.

It’s all mathematics, with no consideration for personal chemistry. Sure, there’s always the chance you could have an encounter in ‘the wild’ but the New York City clients Lucy deals with reek of desperation. They’re insufferably unrealistic and picky. Nobody wants to die alone apparently. As if that was a negative option.

Lucy is no exception; she herself contributes towards the shallowness of our society. At the same time her destitute ex-boyfriend (Chris Evans) reappears in her life, she’s instead drawn closer to a suave billionaire (Pedro Pascal). He is, as per dating terminology, a ‘unicorn’ – he’s rich, tall, handsome (debatable) and is drama-free. Too good to be true, right?

An astutely written observation of love and romance, ‘Materialists‘ is complemented by Song’s stylish direction, which emphasises a world of opulence and superficiality.

My rating: 9 / 10

Freakier Friday (2025)

Director: Nisha Ganatra
Screenplay: Jordan Weiss
Cast: Jamie Lee Curtis, Lindsay Lohan, Julia Butters, Sophia Hammons, Manny Jacinto, Mark Harmon, Chad Michael Murray
Cinematography: Matthew Clark
Editing: Eleanor Infante
Score: Amie Doherty
Genre: Fantasy comedy
Runtime: 111 minutes

Let’s get freaky. Freakier, even.

In this sequel to 2003’s ‘Freaky Friday‘, the generation gap widens. Dr. Tess Coleman (Jamie Lee Curtis) is a grandmother: her daughter Anna (Lindsay Lohan) is now a single mum to Harper (‘Once Upon a Time in Hollywood‘ breakout Julia Butters). Completing the square of body-swappers is Lily (Sophia Hammons), daughter of Anna’s new fiancé and her soon-to-be stepdaughter. The four of them become entangled in each other’s lives courtesy of a shoddy fortune teller. Anna and Harper switch bodies whilst Tess and Lily exchange corporeal forms, with hilarious results.

If you thought the first ‘Freaky Friday‘ was hard to follow, this is double the amount of mental gymnastics required to keep up with who’s who. My advice: don’t overthink it. Just sit back and watch the madness unfold. I had a great time with this movie; I actually laughed out loud! I must’ve switched bodies with someone with a sense of humour.

Jamie Lee Curtis is a hoot – she’s not afraid to poke fun at her (supposedly advanced) age with gags about adult diapers, joint pain and how Facebook is a database of old people. Amidst the jokes, there’s a strong emotional core, touching on the mother-daughter relationship and the conflicts that arise from trying to forge a blended family.

‘Freakier Friday‘ is a rarity – it’s a sequel that doesn’t disappoint in its delivery.

My rating: 8 / 10

Weapons (2025)

Director: Zach Cregger
Screenplay: Zach Cregger
Cast: Josh Brolin, Julia Garner, Cary Christopher, Alden Ehrenreich, Austin Abrams, Benedict Wong, Amy Madigan
Cinematography: Larkin Seiple
Editing: Joe Murphy
Score: Ryan Holladay, Hays Holladay, Zach Cregger
Genre: Mystery horror
Runtime: 128 minutes

At exactly 2:17am, 17 children up and leave their respective houses and scarper into the night, leaving their parents bereft. And full of questions. Where did they disappear to? These kids left of their own volition – this isn’t a cut and dry abduction. The way they’re running is odd too: arms outstretched as if they’re pretending to be fighter jets. All 17 belonged to the same class at school, taught by Ms. Justine Gandy (Julia Garner). Except one boy didn’t flee by foot: Alex, who claims not to know the whereabouts of his classmates.

Justine becomes the town pariah, understandably so, unfair as it may seem. A month after the incident, a community meeting takes place where she unsuccessfully attempts to cool tempers of frantic parents. Her car is vandalised: ‘witch’ is scrawled across it. Could she really be responsible?

‘Weapons‘ is divided into chapters, each from a different character’s point of view. As the portions pass, the enigma begins to unravel. Justine’s story is first; we see her processing the situation by drinking and hooking up with her married ex-boyfriend (Alden Ehrenreich). Then comes Archer (Josh Brolin), grieving father of a young son, who actively seeks an answer to the disappearances (doing a better job than the police certainly). Next: Paul (Justine’s ex, a cop), James (a petty burglar), Marcus (the school principal) and Alex (the boy at the centre of the whole thing).

Good performances from Garner, Brolin and Ehrenreich as flawed characters and an eerie atmosphere keep you sufficiently curious. There’s a couple of jump scares thrown in to maintain the horror levels and some strangely comedic moments courtesy of Alex’s wacky Aunt Gladys but ‘Weapons‘ is a genuinely intriguing mystery in every sense of the word.

My rating: 7 / 10

Bring Her Back (2025)

Director: Danny Philippou, Michael Philippou
Screenplay: Danny Philippou, Bill Hinzman
Cast: Billy Barratt, Sora Wong, Jonah Wren Phillips, Sally Hawkins
Cinematography: Aaron McLisky
Editing: Geoff Lamb
Score: Cornel Wilczek
Genre: Supernatural psychological horror
Runtime: 104 minutes

An Australian horror film is the last place I’d expect to see Sally Hawkins. She’s built her career on Mike Leigh projects (‘Vera Drake‘, ‘Happy-Go-Lucky‘), period pieces (‘Jane Eyre‘, ‘Great Expectations‘) and the family-friendly ‘Paddington‘ series, with the occasional left turn (the blockbuster ‘Godzilla‘ and romantic fantasy gem ‘The Shape of Water‘). This is completely unexpected.

Hawkins plays Laura, a counselor dealing with her own trauma; she lost her daughter in a drowning accident. Her reluctance to move forward is evident: she’s had her dead dog stuffed and on display for visitors. Laura also works as a foster mother. Already looking after a selectively mute boy, she takes in step-brother/sister duo Andy and Piper following their father’s recent passing.

Grief pervades the air. You might assume Laura would be mopey, distant and dressed in black as is customary. Nope. There she is, accompanying Andy and Piper to their dad’s funeral wearing a purple cardigan, garish lipstick and dangly hoop earrings, her hair a curly mop. She’s in the mood to celebrate, not to mourn. She’s got a sinister plan up her sleeve. Coping with loss is never easy, as a counselor should know. When it’s your own child, however, one may venture down a dark path. Laura watches fuzzy VHS tapes of a demonic-looking ritual involving a host cannibalising a corpse and transferring the soul of the deceased into a new body.

It’s visceral and bloody – not for those of you with weak stomachs. Hawkins’ performance captivates throughout and with ‘Bring Her Back‘, the Philippou brothers cast a spell stronger than any magical circle could.

My rating: 7 / 10

The Naked Gun (2025)

Director: Akiva Schaffer
Screenplay: Dan Gregor, Doug Mand, Akiva Schaffer
Cast: Liam Neeson, Pamela Anderson, Paul Walter Hauser, Kevin Durand, Danny Huston
Cinematography: Brandon Trost
Editing: Brian Scott Olds
Score: Lorne Balfe
Genre: Action crime comedy
Runtime: 85 minutes

At the close of the third ‘Naked Gun‘ film, ‘Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult‘, Lieutenant Frank Drebin (Leslie Nielsen) sires a child, a baby boy. This was in 1994, so Liam Neeson (73)’s Frank Drebin Jr. was either born way earlier or he had a paper round in Iraq. You wouldn’t immediately think Neeson is a man in his 70s. He’s imminently pivoting away from action flicks, which have comprised the bulk of his second act as a movie star. It’s a smart move; he can do comedy and he’s game for a laugh here – but Neeson is no Nielsen. Although both started their careers as serious actors (Nielsen starred in ‘Forbidden Planet‘ and ‘The Poseidon Adventure‘ while Neeson got an Oscar nomination for ‘Schindler’s List‘), Nielsen’s comedic shtick proves to be hard to emulate.

‘The Naked Gun‘ (minus the subtitle or wacky opening credits scene) has the appropriate number of visual gags and inane wordplay except none of it made me chuckle, maybe raising the odd smirk here or there. The references are outdated by two decades and the celebrity cameos – from Dave Bautista, “Weird Al” Yankovich (again) and who I believe to be Priscilla Presley (though who can tell these days) – can’t rescue it either.

We’re living in an age where there’s a strong anti-cop sentiment post-George Floyd. ‘ACAB’ is scrawled on walls in graffiti and police cars are banned from appearing in Fortnite. Officers of the law are seen as figures of distrust. Political satire has never ceased, so why can we no longer poke fun at the authorities too? They get a ribbing onscreen; their buffoonery is the target of mockery and jokes made at their expense are sanctioned. No need to hurl abuse at them. Save that for Akiva Schaffer for thinking anyone could replace Leslie Nielsen.

My rating: 5 / 10

The Fantastic Four: First Steps (2025)

Director: Matt Shakman
Screenplay: Josh Friedman, Eric Pearson, Jeff Kaplan, Ian Springer
Cast: Pedro Pascal, Vanessa Kirby, Ebon Moss-Bachrach, Joseph Quinn, Julia Garner, Ralph Ineson
Cinematography: Jess Hall
Score: Michael Giacchino
Genre: Superhero
Runtime: 114 minutes

20 years ago, we got ‘Fantastic Four‘, which did well enough commercially to get a sequel. 10 years later came another ‘Fantastic Four‘ – that one was a box office flop. A further decade brings a new big-budget outing for the third version of the superhero family, this time integrating them into the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

Planet Earth is marked for destruction. This message of doom is delivered by the messenger the Silver Surfer who serves her master, the mighty Galactus. Yes, her. More on that shortly. But it’s not Earth as we know it; specifically, it’s Earth-828, an alternate reality where the citizens are living in a retro-futuristic setting. A place where people listen to music on vinyl and drive Lincoln Continentals, except the technology is advanced and the quartet have a flying car. It’s how artists in the 1960s pictured how the far-flung year of 2000 A.D. would resemble – like a live action ‘Jetsons‘ movie. The period detail is amazing, there’s a million things to spot in such a short amount of time while we’re zipping around.

The retro design makes up for what they’ve done to our lead characters. Starting with Mister Fantastic: casting Pedro Pascal as a dependable, trustworthy guy is a stretch. Vanessa Kirby’s Sue Storm has a couple of nice moments but feels slightly muted. The writers have reduced Johnny Storm / Human Torch (Joseph Quinn) from smokin’ hot ladies’ man to just the plain old annoying little brother because they thought his womanising ways weren’t sexy. By contrast, you have the female incarnation of the Silver Surfer, played by Julia Garner. Now, I actually don’t take issue with the gender swap like so many swathes of fans did online. She’s otherworldly and detached as she should be. Turning the character into a woman means she’s promptly objectified – “Johnny’s girlfriend”, “sexy alien” etc. – I don’t recall the male variant ever receiving this treatment. These screenwriters must still be virgins, surely?

2024 was a cooldown for Marvel films (only one was released, ‘Deadpool & Wolverine‘) so we’re back to the usual two/three per calendar year. ‘The Fantastic Four: First Steps‘ is the weakest of 2025’s trio, behind ‘Captain America: Brave New World‘ and ‘Thunderbolts*‘.

My rating: 6 / 10

I Know What You Did Last Summer (2025)

Director: Jennifer Kaytin Robinson
Screenplay: Sam Lansky, Jennifer Kaytin Robinson
Cast: Madelyn Cline, Chase Sui Wonders, Jonah Hauer-King, Tyriq Withers, Sarah Pidgeon, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Freddie Prinze Jr.
Cinematography: Elisha Christian
Score: Chanda Dancy
Genre: Slasher
Runtime: 111 minutes

I know what you did last summer…..I know what I did – I launched this blog one sunny Friday afternoon last July. I digress.

“Nostalgia is overrated”. So says Julie James (Jennifer Love Hewitt), a character from the original film (and its sequel) upon her return to the coastal town of Southport because of another automobile accident. This time, a group of five friends are responsible for a car plummeting off the side of a cliff on the same snaking road as the fatality that occurred decades earlier. And what happened before shall happen again; a mysterious killer, clad in a slicker and slashing folk with a hook, seeking revenge on guilty teens.

I don’t disagree with Julie’s sentiment. Legacy sequels are all the rage these days. The ‘Scream‘, ‘Jurassic Park / World‘ and ‘Halloween‘ franchises have brought back key players as plot points. Hewitt is reunited with Freddie Prinze Jr.’s Ray Bronson, her fellow survivor from the first two films. Sarah Michelle Gellar brilliantly cameos in a dream sequence. Is this honouring the past? Or is it just drawing from the same well until it dries up?

The logic behind the characters’ actions is plain stupid – whenever they knock the crook out cold, isn’t the immediate course of action to uncover the perpetrator, no? But then, where’s the mystery in that? A few curveballs are thrown at the audience (one of which tarnishes a legacy character’s reputation completely); they’re ridiculous but mad enough to work. I’ll let the writers off the hook.

My rating: 6 / 10

Superman (2025)

Director: James Gunn
Screenplay: James Gunn
Cast: David Corenswet, Rachel Brosnahan, Nicholas Hoult, Edi Gathegi, Anthony Carrigan, Nathan Fillion, Isabela Merced
Cinematography: Henry Braham
Score: John Murphy, David Fleming
Genre: Superhero
Runtime: 129 minutes

From deep beneath the rubble which lay the DCEU bursts forth an all-American saviour… James Gunn? Not who you were expecting? Gunn, the mastermind behind the ‘Guardians of the Galaxy‘ franchise, has flitted between Marvel and DC in the past few years. Following the release of ‘Guardians Vol. 2‘, he was controversially fired due to some dodgy tweets so crossed over to DC where he directed 2021’s ‘The Suicide Squad‘. After being brought back to finish the ‘Guardians‘ trilogy, Gunn has now made DC his permanent home; he’s the head honcho (along with film producer Peter Safran) of the DCU. It’s a soft reboot of the previous cinematic universe, a mishmash of original characters and former favourites. It remains to be seen at this stage which actors will stay in their roles or who will be completely recast.

As for ‘Superman‘, this is no origin story; Superman is an established protector of the planet, has been for three years prior; he and Lois Lane are an item. We’ve had enough genesis stories of late, so this saves precious time when we can instead embrace the future. It’s bold, fresh and colourful. The icy Fortress of Solitude in the Antarctic desert and Green Lantern’s emerald-hued energy constructs are superb. Yes, Green Lantern is one of a bunch of new heroes introduced as part of the ‘Justice Gang’ alongside Mister Terrific and Hawkgirl.

David Corenswet fits the role of Clark Kent / Superman like a glove and Brosnahan makes a capable Lois Lane. I had issues with Nicholas Hoult’s portrayal of Lex Luthor – I felt an older actor with more gravitas should play Superman’s arch-nemesis. Hoult is maybe too young but we all have to start somewhere.

Speaking of starting somewhere, ‘Superman‘ kicks off the DCU with gusto. Gunn might not be directing every movie in this universe but he’s got grand plans – I think Kevin Feige ought to be scared.

My rating: 8 / 10

Jurassic World Rebirth (2025)

Director: Gareth Edwards
Screenplay: David Koepp
Cast: Scarlett Johansson, Mahershala Ali, Jonathan Bailey, Rupert Friend, Manuel Garcia-Rulfo, Ed Skrein
Cinematography: John Mathieson
Score: Alexandre Desplat
Genre: Science fiction thriller
Runtime: 133 minutes

A mere three years after the critical mauling of ‘Jurassic World Dominion‘, we have another entry in the ‘Jurassic’ series: ‘Rebirth‘. As the name suggests, it’s a soft reboot with new characters yet maintaining the spirit of the OG ‘Jurassic Park‘ (1993). For a little while, the original was once the highest grossing film of all time so of course the studio would milk the hell out of the IP but can we let a franchise heal its wounds for a moment before launching more movies?

That said, ‘Rebirth‘ keeps it simple in terms of plot and the number of characters. Following on from the events of ‘Dominion‘, planet Earth is now inhospitable to dinosaurs. The poor creatures can only thrive near the equator where the climate is closest to their old habitat from eons ago. A greedy pharmaceutical rep (Rupert Friend) recruits skilled covert operative Zora Bennett (Scarlett Johansson) to obtain blood samples from three living dinosaurs so he can develop a cure for heart disease. Rounding off the group are paleontologist (dinosaur nerd) Henry Loomis (Jonathan Bailey) and team leader Kincaid (Mahershala Ali). What they don’t immediately know is that the island they shipwreck at was once a testing ground for dinosaur experiments, including one ‘D-rex’ – a ‘Distortus rex’, looking like a Xenomorph on steroids.

Our crew behind the camera are dino-mite too: Gareth Edwards is no stranger to working with big beasts (he directed 2014’s ‘Godzilla‘, which kicked off Universal’s ‘Monsterverse‘) whilst the first film’s screenwriter David Koepp returns to humanise things. Together, they make it feel as fresh as it could be, delivering spectacle and roaringly good fun. A sequel is not required, unless Universal Pictures want the franchise to go the way of the dinosaurs.

My rating: 7 / 10

F1 (2025)

Director: Joseph Kosinski
Screenplay: Ehren Kruger
Cast: Brad Pitt, Damson Idris, Kerry Condon, Javier Bardem
Cinematography: Claudio Miranda
Score: Hans Zimmer
Genre: Sports drama
Runtime: 156 minutes

On your marks. Get set. Go!

From the same director behind ‘Top Gun: Maverick‘, Joseph Kosinski, comes ‘F1‘, whizzing past you on your left. It’s most definitely a film for petrolheads, I must admit it’s not my cup of tea. It’s not one continuous circuit for 2.5 hours; there’s a plot too which gives you something to focus on if fast cars aren’t your thing.

Racing team owner Ruben Cervantes (Javier Bardem), millions of dollars in debt, approaches his old teammate Sonny Hayes (Brad Pitt) with a proposal: join his team and win at least one of nine Grands Prix in the World Championship and bask in your former glory. It beats Hayes’ current existence; travelling around in a van like a bum.

Okay, so you’re Brad Pitt. That don’t impress me much.

With Sonny Hayes back in the driver’s seat again after a life-altering injury derailed his famous career 30 years ago, tensions mount between Hayes and hotshot rookie Joshua Pearce (Damson Idris). They’re both alpha males, making the job of uniting as a crew tricky.

Okay, so you’ve got a car. That don’t impress me much.

The commercialism is a tad off-putting; their racing suits adorned with various brand logos and the cars slapped with adverts. It’s a billboard in cinematic form. I understand though, these companies have to make money somehow and the producers of the movie itself needed the sponsorship deals to lower the staggering cost. When you’ve blown the budget getting Brad Pitt involved, it makes sense.

The cast all pull their weight; Idris is a star on the rise. Yet the disconnect I felt from the subject matter hampered my engagement. No victory lap required.

My rating: 5 / 10

M3GAN 2.0 (2025)

Director: Gerard Johnstone
Screenplay: Gerard Johnstone
Cast: Allison Williams, Violet McGraw, Amie Donald, Jenna Davis, Ivanna Sakhno, Jemaine Clement
Cinematography: Toby Oliver
Score: Chris Bacon
Genre: Science fiction action
Runtime: 120 minutes

Hold on to your vaginas!

To completely misquote Harvey Dent’s line from ‘The Dark Knight’: “you either die a villain, or live long enough to see yourself become the hero.” In this case, closer to an anti-hero.

Two years after the chaos that was ‘M3GAN‘, Gemma (Allison Williams) and her niece Cady (Violet McGraw) find themselves under threat from ‘AMELIA’ (autonomous military engagement logistics and infiltration android), a rogue AI housed in a humanoid adult body. AMELIA is on the hunt for everyone involved in her creation and since she’s been coded with M3GAN’s data, Gemma has no real choice but to reassemble the latter from the scrapheap to save the day. The robotic doll’s request: make her taller, accommodating the fact that the child actress portraying M3GAN’s physical form has grown a foot or so.

‘M3GAN 2.0‘ eschews the horror aspects that made the first film a hit in favour of an all-out action escapade. M3GAN was a convincingly creepy doll but her devolution into one of the ‘good guys’ undoes the effort of the original. Her uncanny valley features used to be menacing, not anymore; she’s now reduced to spouting sarky quips.

It’s serviceable as a story – more or less. I can get on board with the message that ‘AI is bad’ but it’s hammered home to the point of exhaustion. The dialogue isn’t user-friendly; there’s a load of technobabble flying from every corner which just sounds like white noise to me. I think there’s a bug in the system – let’s press Ctrl+Alt+Delete.

My rating: 5 / 10

Tornado (2025)

Director: John Maclean
Screenplay: John Maclean
Cast: Kōki, Jack Lowden, Takehiro Hira, Tim Roth, Joanne Whalley
Cinematography: Robbie Ryan
Score: Jed Kurzel
Genre: Period action drama
Runtime: 91 minutes

A full decade after his last feature film, ‘Slow West‘, John Maclean returns with another revisionist Western: ‘Tornado‘. This one, filmed on location in Maclean’s native Scotland, makes great use of the steep, rugged hills of the Edinburgh area.

It includes the elements of a traditional Western – a lone protagonist up against the forces of evil, some stolen treasure and bloody vengeance – but infused with a healthy dose of Japanese samurai swordplay. A peculiar mix, yet it works wonderfully.

The plot is simple to follow: our central figure, Tornado (Kōki), fed up with her life on the road as a travelling puppeteer alongside her father (Takehiro Hira), seizes the opportunity to change and swipes two sacks of gold from a thuggish cabal, led by Sugarman (Tim Roth). Thus begins a chase across the mountains and nearby forestry to recoup their missing loot from her grasp.

Tornado is a woman of few words, much like Clint Eastwood’s character in Sergio Leone’s ‘Dollars‘ trilogy. In the long gaps between snatches of dialogue, you can’t help but marvel at the landscape; it’s as bleak as it is beautiful. In fact, the muddy terrain and its absolute lack of glamour heighten the atmosphere of hostility as Tornado flees on foot. Robbie Ryan’s cinematography in the woodland scenes, using natural light, goes down a storm as does the stirring score from Jed Kurzel.

“I am Tornado. Remember my name.” she says at the end of her puppet show. Is this a request or a command? Either way, I shall.

My rating: 7 / 10

28 Years Later (2025)

Director: Danny Boyle
Screenplay: Alex Garland
Cast: Jodie Comer, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Alfie Williams, Ralph Fiennes, Jack O’Connell
Cinematography: Anthony Dod Mantle
Score: Young Fathers
Genre: Post-apocalyptic horror
Runtime: 115 minutes

It’s surely the most anticipated movie in yonks. The Rage virus swept across mainland Britain in ‘28 Days Later‘ and we saw the militarised state London became in the aftermath in ‘28 Weeks Later‘. Skipping the nixed ‘28 Months Later‘, and we’re now 28 years into the pandemic.

A community of survivors have established a town on Lindisfarne, known as Holy Island, off the coast of the north east of England. In a world devoid of modern trappings, the residents live a medieval-style existence. Fletchers craft arrows, which are used by the youngsters as part of target practice. As they shoot, footage of Laurence Olivier’s ‘Henry V‘ (1944) is intercut showing a bundle of arrows soaring into the sky, driving home the medieval theme. This disease has changed the way people operate; it’s a rustic way of life for folks. There is still order; they’ve not been reduced to savages the way the zombies have. I felt echoes of the COVID-19 pandemic experienced 5 years ago – we united, letting the earth heal.

Tonally, ‘28 Years‘ is more in line with the original film; an emotional, character-driven affair, with great performances from Jodie Comer, Ralph Fiennes and newcomer Alfie Williams. But be warned: this is the first in a new trilogy from the duo behind ‘28 Days‘, director Danny Boyle and screenwriter Alex Garland, so don’t expect a quick resolution in this installment. Instead, rather disappointingly, it feels drawn out like the endless stretches of English countryside. Boyle’s sharp direction and an adequate amount of zombie killing kept me satisfied but I couldn’t help feel a tighter story, told in only a single picture, would’ve worked better. I’m relying on Garland to have the brains to realise his ambition.

While Danny Boyle has a breather (he helms part 3), Nia DaCosta takes over directing duties for the following chapter of the triad, ‘28 Years Later: The Bone Temple‘, slated for release next January.

My rating: 6 / 10

Clown in a Cornfield (2025)

Director: Eli Craig
Screenplay: Carter Blanchard, Eli Craig
Cast: Katie Douglas, Aaron Abrams, Carson McCormac, Kevin Durand, Will Sasso
Cinematography: Brian Pearson
Score: Brandon Roberts, Marcus Trumpp
Genre: Slasher
Runtime: 96 minutes

There’s not been a dearth of clown-related films on the cinematic landscape of late; last year, we had ‘Joker: Folie à Deux‘ and ‘Terrifier 3‘ coming out a week apart. ‘Clown in a Cornfield‘ does exactly what it says on the tin. But any attempt to make this more interesting than the premise suggests was lost among the sheaves of corn.

Arriving in the small town of Kettle Springs, the recently bereaved Dr. Maybrook (Aaron Abrams) and his daughter, Quinn (Katie Douglas), set up home in a dusty old house. There is an odd vibe hanging in the air. Like it’s the town time forgot.

While her dad fills the vacancy of local doctor, Quinn falls in with a bunch of bratty teenage pranksters who create mock horror YouTube videos where one of them dresses up as Frendo (a mascot of the nearby corn syrup factory) and pretends to slaughter the others. All harmless fun until they realise someone else is masquerading as the creepy clown. With not so pure intentions.

It feels reminiscent of a B-movie; a shoestring budget, terrible performances, inexpensive looking practical effects. Maybe if the ‘B’ stood for ‘bloody awful’. I didn’t entirely have high expectations going in but boy, was this a stinker! The movie tries to juggle many balls; developing the fractured relationship between Quinn and her father (hampered by a lack of acting ability from Ms. Douglas), the horror element (light on frights) and some vague Gen Z social commentary (which comes off as preachy). Eli Craig, director and screenwriter, has dropped these balls. What a clown.

My rating: 4 / 10

Ballerina (2025)

Director: Len Wiseman
Screenplay: Shay Hatten
Cast: Ana de Armas, Anjelica Huston, Gabriel Byrne, Lance Reddick, Norman Reedus, Ian McShane, Keanu Reeves
Cinematography: Romain Lacourbas
Score: Tyler Bates, Joel J. Richard
Genre: Action thriller
Runtime: 125 minutes

Taking place in the John Wick universe, ‘Ballerina‘ slots in between ‘Parabellum‘ and ‘Chapter 4‘ and focuses on Eve (Ana de Armas), a ballet dancer and assassin, trained by the Ruska Roma crime syndicate. They featured sparingly in ‘Parabellum‘, headed up by a Russian-accented Anjelica Huston but they take centre stage here. Eve is on a revenge mission: to kill the man (Gabriel Byrne) responsible for her father’s death. Little Eve (perfect child casting) saw the tragedy unfold in front of her, thrusting her into a world of violence.

Strongly warned against doing this, Eve is resolute and won’t back down. She risks defying the orders of the Ruska Roma if she proceeds. Will this Eve bite the apple and be banished from Eden? The assassins are bound by a list of rules – dare she break these tenets and face the consequences?

It’s riveting fare, moving along at a quick pace. A different director from the main franchise – this time it’s Len Wiseman, who helmed the ‘Underworld‘ series – yet the excellent set pieces remain, whether fighting in a gaudy nightclub or a snowy Alpine village.

Keanu Reeves pops up in what I’d describe as an extended cameo. His presence isn’t required; let Ana de Armas stand on her own two feet. She makes for a more than capable action heroine, walloped around a good bit by men bigger than her, though learns to use certain tactics in order to vanquish foes. If Reeves had overstayed his welcome, it might as well be classed as another Wick flick. At least with Eve’s character, we get choreographed fight scenes and acting ability.

Eve has scope to return in a ‘Ballerina‘ sequel or further on in ‘John Wick 5‘ – yes, it’s been greenlit; the guy is indestructible.

My rating: 7 / 10

The Salt Path (2024)

Director: Marianne Elliott
Screenplay: Rebecca Lenkiewicz
Cast: Gillian Anderson, Jason Isaacs
Cinematography: Helene Louvart
Score: Chris Roe
Genre: Biographical drama
Runtime: 115 minutes

Husband and wife Moth and Raynor Winn lose their home, their worldly possessions and most of their money after a business deal backfires. To make a bad situation worse, Moth (Jason Isaacs) has been diagnosed with corticobasal degeneration, a neurological disease that affects his physical state, with a life expectancy of around 6 years.

Their house repossessed, the couple set off on a hike along the South West Coast Path on the perimeter of the English coast. They’ve got nowhere better to go, nothing else to do. It’s 600 miles long so they’ve got plenty of time to figure out what on earth they do next. It seems cruel to let Moth trudge up hills after we see him lolloping down a hospital corridor in a flashback.

These flashbacks pepper the first 50 or so miles, filling in the puzzle pieces as to how the pair have ended up homeless. It’s all a true story, based on a memoir of the same name Raynor (played here by Gillian Anderson) wrote.

What a beautiful part of the world. I’d love to experience it for myself but I’m too lazy to put the steps in. But there’s no reward without pain as the Winns find out. There’s an unglamorous sort of beauty to their struggle. Absolutely no dignity (especially when Raynor tries to withdraw the remaining £1.38 from their bank account) but inspirational through and through.

The film reminded me of the quote from science fiction writer Ursula K. Le Guin: “It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.”. And what a journey it is.

My rating: 8 / 10

The Phoenician Scheme (2025)

Director: Wes Anderson
Screenplay: Wes Anderson
Cast: Benicio del Toro, Mia Threapleton, Michael Cera, Riz Ahmed, Tom Hanks, Bryan Cranston, Mathieu Amalric, Richard Ayoade, Jeffrey Wright, Scarlett Johansson, Benedict Cumberbatch, Rupert Friend, Hope Davis
Cinematography: Bruno Delbonnel
Score: Alexandre Desplat
Genre: Espionage black comedy
Runtime: 105 minutes

‘The Phoenician Scheme‘ is the venerated Wes Anderson’s unlucky 13th feature length outing. Over 20+ years, he’s developed his own idiosyncratic style of filmmaking; a rich colour palette of yellows and oranges and shots made to look as if they’re two-dimensional paintings. He’s got his die-hard fans; if you’re one of them, you’ll no doubt love this film greater than I did.

Visually, as ever, it’s striking. As the opening credits appear, we’re treated to an aerial shot of Benicio del Toro (as Zsa-Zsa Korda) in the bath (a tray covering his modesty), while nurses walk around the perimeter of the screen. Anderson’s quirky approach makes up for a lack of coherent plot. Zsa-Zsa Korda is an industralist keen to remodel the area of Phoenicia (the Eastern Mediterranean) in his image. Having survived countless assassination attempts due to his shady business dealings, he decides to leave everything he owns to his pious nun of a daughter, Liesl (Mia Threapleton, in her first leading movie role). She’s his only female child; he has nine sons – he has more children than Boris Johnson!

The screenplay is too verbose with the actors trading lines back and forth at a pace so fast my brain didn’t comprehend half of what was going on. What I did understand devolved into silliness quickly, it sadly failed to ignite any strong, positive feelings from me.

Nevertheless, the cast is an embarrassment of riches: Benedict Cumberbatch, Scarlett Johansson, Tom Hanks, Bryan Cranston, Jeffrey Wright to name but a few and Anderson’s regular musical collaborator, Alexandre Desplat, delivers another charming score. If Wes ploughs on and conceives his 14th project, he should scheme to make a story capable of following. With less Michael Cera lingering in the background like a stench.

My rating: 5 / 10

Hallow Road (2025)

Director: Babak Anvari
Screenplay: William Gillies
Cast: Rosamund Pike, Matthew Rhys, Megan McDonnell
Cinematography: Kit Fraser
Score: Lorne Balfe, Peter Adams
Genre: Thriller
Runtime: 80 minutes

Every parent’s worst nightmare: a panicked message from their child saying they’ve been involved in an automobile accident. This frightful scenario happens to couple Frank and Maddie (Matthew Rhys and Rosamund Pike respectively), who receive a phone call at 2am from their teenage daughter, Alice – she’s hit someone and crashed into a ditch. Maddie, a parademic suffering from PTSD, instructs Alice to perform CPR on the victim. An ambulance is on its way, she tells her parents – but with Alice in a agitated and unpredictable state, can we really believe that?

Frank and Maddie jump into their own car, burning rubber through the deserted streets to get to their daughter before the authorities can. On this one tense journey, seemingly running forever, emotions run high as the pair have differing approaches on how to deal with such impossible circumstances. It feels like a vehicle-bound play, a two-hander between Pike and Rhys, both giving solid performances.

As it’s nighttime, Babak Anvari makes great use of artificial light; the couple stop at a set of traffic lights and the red envelopes their faces to suggest a sense of danger. An added detail (witnessed on the phone lock screen) is that this stressful incident unfolds on Hallowe’en, doubling down on the all-too-real horror of the situation.

What was grounded in reality and a believable premise takes a U-turn and enters somewhat supernatural territory towards the end, which undoes a bit of the edge-of-your-seat suspense. Definitely a ride worth taking though.

My rating: 7 / 10

Mission: Impossible – The Final Reckoning (2025)

Director: Christopher McQuarrie
Screenplay: Christopher McQuarrie, Erik Jendresen
Cast: Tom Cruise, Hayley Atwell, Ving Rhames, Simon Pegg, Esai Morales, Pom Klementieff, Henry Czerny, Angela Bassett, Holt McCallany, Janet McTeer, Nick Offerman, Hannah Waddingham
Cinematography: Fraser Taggart
Editing: Eddie Hamilton
Score: Max Aruj, Alfie Godfrey
Genre: Action spy
Runtime: 170 minutes

At the beginning of ‘Mission: Impossible – The Final Reckoning‘, box office saviour himself Tom Cruise pops up in a quick 1 minute clip thanking fans for coming to watch his new movie at the cinema (a moot point if you’re pirating it off 123movies). And although this isn’t the strongest installment in the series, it’s worth experiencing on the biggest screen you can acquire.

Continuing on from the previous film, the objective – to seek control of ‘the Entity’, an artificial intelligence that has world-ending capabilities if it falls into the wrong hands. Due to a lack of decent antagonists, this harmful A.I. is the deadliest threat facing Ethan Hunt’s team, rendering the eighth ‘Mission: Impossible‘ a soulless ultimate outing. The constant chatter of MacGuffins made me want to shout “less talking, more blowing up stuff!”.

There’s plenty of diverting sequences; director Christopher McQuarrie knows how to make a action-packed spectacle. Ethan Hunt faces danger at two extremes; clinging onto a chartered plane miles above the ground and venturing to the ocean floor to investigate an abandoned submarine. Watching all this water doesn’t help if you’re needing the loo by this stage. Bad news – you’re only about halfway through.

Touting this as the ‘final reckoning’ is bold for a major money-making franchise. I could earn some dough myself from betting this isn’t the end for Ethan and the gang but we’ll see. It’s remarkable that Tom Cruise still does his own stunts at the age of 62 but perhaps it’s time to put him and his puffy face out to pasture.

This review will self-destruct in 5 seconds…

My rating: 6 / 10

Final Destination Bloodlines (2025)

Director: Zach Lipovsky, Adam Stein
Screenplay: Guy Busick, Lori Evans Taylor
Cast: Kaitlyn Santa Juana, Teo Briones, Richard Harmon, Owen Patrick Joyner, Rya Kihlstedt, Anna Lore, Brec Bassinger, Tony Todd
Cinematography: Christian Sebaldt
Editing: Sabrina Pitre
Score: Tim Wynn
Genre: Supernatural horror
Runtime: 110 minutes

Will there ever be a final ‘Final Destination‘? It’s now been a quarter of a century of scaring cinemagoers into becoming hermits and not daring to venture outside in fear of the most ridiculous manner of death befalling them. More than 50% of accidents happen at home so you’re not safe there either.

This new entry acts as a prequel; the opening sequence takes place in the 1960s and follows a young woman’s premonition that the fancy rooftop restaurant (over 400 metres high) she attends with her boyfriend will collapse. Since she prevents this catastrophe from occurring, the number of lives she saves from the clutches of doom is myriad, so the stakes are higher than the previous installments where, say, you had 8 survivors.

Because of the vast tally of those cheating their fate, it’s absurdly taken Death decades to pick them all off one by one. Maybe the Grim Reaper got tired and took an extended vacation at the midway point? By the present day, many of the survivors have gone on to start families, making Death’s job extra difficult. It kills people through their genetic bloodline, hence the title.

Talking about things taking time, the runtime is the longest of the franchise. The average length of the first five movies is 91 minutes – which made them short, punchy rushes. ‘Bloodlines‘ felt drawn out and being the sixth movie, past its use-by date. Very much flogging a dead horse. Let this series rest in peace.

That said, the fatalities are sublimely splattery as expected and the song choices are a knowing wink to the audience. The late, great Tony Todd returns as the enigmatic Mr. Bludworth, the film’s MVP. Whilst only appearing in a single scene, his screen presence makes it worthwhile. A fitting send-off to both the character and the actor himself, musing on enjoying every second of life while you can – especially poignant given Todd’s health condition during filming.

My rating: 5 / 10

The Surfer (2024)

Director: Lorcan Finnegan
Screenplay: Thomas Martin
Cast: Nicolas Cage, Julian McMahon
Cinematography: Radek Ładczuk
Editing: Tony Cranstoun
Score: François Tétaz
Genre: Psychological thriller
Runtime: 100 minutes

Nicolas Cage is ‘The Surfer’; from Australia, raised in the States but returned to the place of his upbringing so he can buy his childhood home. It’s on the side of a cliff, overlooking the beach he spent his youth catching waves. A house with that view doesn’t come cheap so the Surfer, intending to move his wife and son there, desperately tries to get in touch with his broker in order to procure enough funds to close the deal in time for Christmas.

He runs afoul of a hostile gang of surf-loving thugs who proclaim: ‘don’t live here, don’t surf here’ to non-locals. Not the most welcoming blokes.

In the constant shadow of the bullies, the Surfer spends the next few days practically living in the nearby car park, waiting in vain for the call from the broker. He gradually loses his personal possessions one by one; his shoes, watch, phone and his wedding ring are exchanged for various items. Material belongings are replaceable but with each item lost, a layer of his sanity is stripped away. He’s reduced to scrabbling in bins for a meal and there’s a moment where he bites a rat to sate his hunger. He is a broken man; desperation personified.

It’s the middle of an Australian summer, the sun beating down on beach-goers. The film is like a heat-induced dizzy spell; magnificently hallucinatory camerawork, zooming into the Surfer’s face, the clifftop house pictured in shimmering light as if it’s a mirage. The sublime cinematography really captures the sun-dappled locale, the sky an almost unworldly azure. Cage gives his usual over-the-top performance yet it actually works in his favour; it plays into the heightened sense of reality.

My rating: 9 / 10

Thunderbolts* (2025)

Director: Jake Schreier
Screenplay: Eric Pearson, Joanna Calo
Cast: Florence Pugh, Sebastian Stan, Wyatt Russell, Olga Kurylenko, Lewis Pullman, Geraldine Viswanathan, David Harbour, Hannah John-Kamen, Julis Louis-Dreyfus
Cinematography: Andrew Droz Palermo
Editing: Angela Catanzaro, Harry Yoon
Score: Son Lux
Genre: Superhero
Runtime: 126 minutes

CIA director Valentina Allegra de Fontaine (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) risks impeachment due to her involvement with the O.X.E. Group, which has been conducting experiments on humans. To eliminate all traces of wrongdoings, she intends to ensnare her operatives and dispatch them.

This motley crew are:

Yelena Belova (Florence Pugh) – an assassin trained in the infamous Red Room, adoptive sister of Scarlett Johansson’s late Black Widow.
John Walker / U.S. Agent (Wyatt Russell) – a knockoff Captain America with none of the goody two-shoes quality about him, only hostility.
Ava Starr / Ghost (Hannah John-Kamen) – she has the power to pass through objects as a result of a molecular instability, first seen in ‘Ant-Man and the Wasp‘.
Antonia Dreykov / Taskmaster – a professional killer who can mimic others’ fighting styles, introduced in ‘Black Widow‘ (2021) alongside Belova.

Throw in the new character of Bob (Lewis Pullman); one of de Fontaine’s human guinea pigs, plus the returning Bucky Barnes (Sebastian Stan) and Red Guardian (David Harbour), Yelena’s father-figure, and you have the Thunderbolts, a bunch of lovable rogues thrust together in less-than-perfect circumstances – Marvel’s answer to Suicide Squad. There are bad guys and there are worse guys, these are the former.

It may seem a lot of info to take in, since the characters come from separate corners of the vast MCU but the writing deftly weaves their narratives into one entertaining action romp. It’s not just hits and giggles however, there’s a real vein of existentialism throbbing underneath the superhero armour.

As ever, the final scenes are crucial – they set up the stage for Phase 6 of the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

My rating: 8 / 10

The Accountant 2 (2025)

Director: Gavin O’Connor
Screenplay: Bill Dubuque
Cast: Ben Affleck, Jon Bernthal, Cynthia Addai-Robinson, Daniella Pineda, J.K. Simmons
Cinematography: Seamus McGarvey
Editing: Richard Pearson
Score: Bryce Dessner
Genre: Action thriller
Runtime: 132 minutes

Christian Wolff returns. Or Carl Gauss, Charles Babbage, Lewis Carroll…whichever mathematically-based pseudonym he chooses to operate under. He’s the titular ‘Accountant’, an autistic numbers whiz who undertakes ‘creative accounting’ for some unsavoury characters. This sequel, set 8 years later, sees Wolff (Ben Affleck) do far less equations; this feels like more of an out-and-out action thriller than the previous film. Also returning is Marybeth Medina (Cynthia Addai-Robinson), a United States Treasury agent whose former boss Ray King (J.K. Simmons) is unceremoniously killed off in the first five minutes, prompting a mystery to solve concerning a missing child.

Together with Wolff’s estranged brother Braxton (Jon Bernthal) – the pair reunited after yet another lengthy period of time with zero communication – they become involved with drug cartels and human traffickers. Plot-wise, it’s a bit of a muddle but the highlight is the brothers’ sparky chemistry – Bernthal the hot-head while Affleck plays the straight man, amusingly deadpan. It’s nice we get to see more of Wolff’s partner-in-crime Justine, who has non-verbal autism and speaks using an English-accented computer program. She now shepherds her own band of Baker Street irregulars, a gang of technology wizards who can hack into anyone’s PC in seconds.

I hear a third ‘Accountant‘ movie is in development – I want a road trip-style adventure where we follow the two guys getting themselves into all sorts of scrapes along the way. Better make it the last in the series, because we know just how much Christian Wolff likes to finish things.

My rating: 6 / 10

Until Dawn (2025)

Director: David F. Sandberg
Screenplay: Gary Dauberman, Blair Butler
Cast: Ella Rubin, Michael Cimino, Odessa A’zion, Ji-young Yoo, Belmont Cameli, Peter Stormare
Cinematography: Maxime Alexandre
Editing: Michel Aller
Score: Benjamin Wallfisch
Genre: Survival horror
Runtime: 103 minutes

While based on a PlayStation 4 game of the same name, ‘Until Dawn’ veers significantly from its source material. In the video game, the player, from what I gather, has to make decisions that can alter their outcome. They either die or survive due to the choices they’ve made, learning that actions, no matter how big or small, sometimes have fatal consequences.

The cinematic adaptation strips this interactive element away and forces you to become a bystander to your average ‘teens in a cabin in the woods’ kind of horror flick. The group of youngsters must work against the clock to escape their grim surroundings and stay alive…until dawn.

If you went in ‘blind’, you’d be thrown by the five protagonists’ deaths in the first portion. Then it’ll dawn on you that they’re caught in a time loop which keeps undoing their demises. As one of the characters actually says: “it’s just like in that movie”, showing a level of self-awareness of how unoriginal the concept is. If they last until all the sand has gushed through an overturned hourglass, they succeed. If they fail after a dozen or so attempts, they’re trapped forever in eternal gloom.

With the numerous fatalities, expect plenty of gore amid the typical masked killer slashings and half-baked plot (which probably made more sense in the video game than it does here). A false dawn indeed.

Can you survive till sunrise? Or at least 103 minutes of such banality?

My rating: 4 / 10

The Penguin Lessons (2024)

Director: Peter Cattaneo
Screenplay: Jeff Pope
Cast: Steve Coogan, Jonathan Pryce
Cinematography: Xavi Gimenez
Editing: Robin Peters, Tariq Anwar
Score: Federico Jusid
Genre: Comedy-drama
Runtime: 112 minutes

Argentina. 1976. In a country beset with political turmoil, Tom Michell (Steve Coogan) is hired to teach English at a private boys school. He struggles to do so; the boys are sons of upper class business types and are a rowdy bunch. A nearby bombing means no lessons for a week out of safety concerns so Tom visits neighbouring Uruguay. To impress a woman he meets dancing the night before, he saves a poor penguin from an oil slick on the beach. Try as he might to return it to its natural habit of the water, the bird is having none of it and follows Tom further and further inland. Thus, he reluctantly smuggles it back to the school and hides it in his lodgings.

The film tries to straddle the line between comedy and drama, failing at both. You have the inevitable farce of Tom attempting to hide the penguin from the headmaster (Jonathan Pryce) due to a ‘no pets’ rule, which didn’t even raise a smirk from me. On the other hand, we get an insight into how Argentinian politics of the era and the military coup d’etat that overthrew Isabel Peron’s government affected the lives of ordinary citizens. It comes off as too lightweight though.

Steve Coogan, known for his comedic performances, makes for a charmless leading man. When a penguin generates more interest and has a better screen presence than the lead actor, you know something’s gone terribly wrong. I felt like one of Michell’s students; driven to distraction. Not worth getting in a flap about.

My rating: 5 / 10

Sinners (2025)

Director: Ryan Coogler
Screenplay: Ryan Coogler
Cast: Michael B. Jordan, Hailee Steinfeld, Miles Caton, Jack O’Connell, Wunmi Mosaku, Jayme Lawson, Omar Miller, Buddy Guy, Delroy Lindo
Cinematography: Autumn Durald Arkapaw
Editing: Michael P. Shawver
Score: Ludwig Göransson
Genre: Period supernatural horror
Runtime: 137 minutes

Identical twins, ‘Smoke’ and ‘Stack’ Moore (both played by Michael B. Jordan to the delight of many, I’m sure) return to their roots in Mississippi in Dust Bowl-era America after making good money up north in Chicago. With this wealth, they intend to start up a juke joint, a sort of bar featuring singing and gambling, for the town’s black community. Their young cousin Sammie, proficient in playing the guitar, is hired for entertainment. There’s a supernatural potency to his music; it’s a siren call for forces of evil – vampires.

Speaking in a Southern drawl, the cast are unintelligible to my ears so the personal circumstances of the brothers goes over my head unfortunately. I could understand every 5th word – ‘Y’all this, y’all that’ etc. That’s not a criticism of the quality of acting; conveying a message takes more than words and I got the general gist of what was going on.

‘Sinners‘ comes into its stride when dusk falls on the juke joint’s opening night. The fanged beasts come out of the shadows, and as per vampiric tradition, have to be invited inside a property. Don’t let them in!

The film’s greatest strength is the musical score, composed by Coogler’s previous collaborator Ludwig Göransson. It’s an ode to American blues music, with some gospel, soul, jazz and Irish folk thrown in as well. The score takes the songs of the Deep South in the 1930s and ensures them a legacy. Props to Miles Caton (as Sammie) in his big screen debut; he has such musicality in his veins.

Stay for the post-credits scene starring guitar legend Buddy Guy, who influenced the likes of Eric Clapton, Jimi Hendrix and Jeff Beck.

My rating: 7 / 10

Drop (2025)

Director: Christopher Landon
Screenplay: Jillian Jacobs, Chris Roach
Cast: Meghann Fahy, Brandon Sklenar
Cinematography: Marc Spicer
Editing: Ben Baudhuin
Score: Bear McCreary
Genre: Thriller
Runtime: 95 minutes

What’s the worst first date you’ve been on? Take that, and multiply it by a million. Then it’s on the same level as Violet (Meghann Fahy) and Henry (Brandon Sklenar)’s first in-person meeting after three months of texting back and forth.

Violet entrusts her sister to babysit her son while she’s out. As soon as she enters the swanky restaurant, she’s bombarded with AirDrops – that’s when someone can digitally share pictures with any Apple device within a certain proximity. Initially, she thinks it’s a stupid prank and brushes it off. The messages, however, get progressively antagonistic, the anonymous sender revealing they know Violet’s name, the location of her house and promises they will kill her son unless she does their bidding. She’s tasked with killing Henry. Drop-dead? Well, he is, admittedly.

With eyes watching her every move, Violet frantically tries to work out the identity of the mystery ‘dropper’ – it could be anyone in a 50 foot radius. Any of the patrons? The serving staff? The sleazy piano player? We have a technological whodunnit on our hands – which is impossible to solve since everyone’s glued to their iPhones.

Stylishly shot by horror hotshot Christopher Landon (‘Happy Death Day‘, ‘Freaky‘, ‘We Have a Ghost‘), this isn’t his usual blend of comedy and scares. It’s played straight, with Violet being a survivor of domestic abuse – including such a sensitive subject matter adds weight to the proceedings.

A white-knuckle ride from start to finish; veering into implausibility at times but totally gripping. Drop what you’re doing and go see this immediately. It might be the perfect date movie.

My rating: 7 / 10

The Amateur (2025)

Director: James Hawes
Screenplay: Ken Nolan, Gary Spinelli
Cast: Rami Malek, Rachel Brosnahan, Caitriona Balfe, Michael Stuhlbarg, Holt McCallany, Julianne Nicholson, Laurence Fishburne
Cinematography: Martin Ruhe
Editing: Jonathan Amos
Score: Volker Bertelmann
Genre: Vigilante action spy
Runtime: 123 minutes

Charlie (Rami Malek), a basement-dwelling CIA encryption nerd, is widowed when his wife Sarah (Rachel Brosnahan) is killed in a botched hostage situation during a terror attack at a London hotel. Uncovering workplace corruption on a higher level and knowing nothing will be done in regards to Sarah’s death, Charlie blackmails his superiors to give him basic field preparation in order to seek some retribution.

Blinded by grief, Charlie believes he has what it takes to avenge his spouse. “You couldn’t even beat a 90 year old nun in an arm wrestling match” he’s amusingly told at one point. He struggles to fire a loaded gun. He’s out of his depths. Not completely. He’s scrawny of build, but has the expertise and technology to surveil people and craft explosives. Picture Q undertaking the duties of James Bond. Underestimate weedy tech guys at your peril!

Obviously taking lives is wrong. But you can’t blame Charlie; he’s got this underdog quality; a minnow versus a shiver of sharks. I could not help rooting for him to succeed in his quest for vengeance in the face of unassailable odds.

This approach to the spy/action genre is refreshing. I counted only two short fight sequences (one of which Charlie features in) so overall it’s less brawling, more cat-and-mouse game-oriented, which makes it especially enthralling. Amateur (couple of) hour(s)? Absolutely not. Malek is a fine actor, perfectly cast as the unlikely action star, and there’s strong support from Laurence Fishburne as Charlie’s training mentor.

My rating: 8 / 10

Restless (2024)

Director: Jed Hart
Screenplay: Jed Hart
Cast: Lyndsey Marshal, Aston McAuley, Barry Ward
Cinematography: David Bird
Editing: Anna Meller
Genre: Thriller dark comedy drama
Runtime: 89 minutes

Neighbours. Everybody needs good neighbours.

Nicky (Lyndsey Marshal) could only dream for some. She lives alone (her son is at university) in a semi-detached house; the other half used to belong to her deceased parents. Underpaid and underappreciated at her job as a nurse, she spends what little free time she has baking cakes, listening to classical music and watching snooker. Pretty idyllic. Everything changes once next door acquires a new occupant, the aggressive Deano (Aston McAuley). In stark contrast to Nicky, Deano enjoys nothing more than inviting his mates over and blasting obnoxious rave tracks all night. Every night. Relentlessly.

The constant pounding of a bassline invading her bedroom renders poor Nicky an insomniac. She’s become a prisoner inside her own domesticity. A brief respite: a thunderstorm-induced power cut occurs, an exaltation in between bouts of noise pollution. She leaves home one morning and ends up stepping in dog poo, which she assumes is the fault of her neighbour. In a darkly comedic flourish, she scrapes the excrement off her shoe and adds it to her mixing bowl. She presents to Deano: a plate of delicious chocolate treats.

‘Restless‘ is the kind of film that works best in the United Kingdom. If the events had unfolded in an American suburb, Nicky would’ve marched up to Deano’s door and blasted him away with a shotgun after just the first sleepless night. Bang – problem solved. Instead, this is a taut thrill ride where, as the dread gradually mounts, you think things couldn’t get worse…you’re proven wrong. Lyndsey Marshal is fantastic – an underrated actress. Don’t miss it!

My rating: 8 / 10

Death of a Unicorn (2025)

Director: Alex Scharfman
Screenplay: Alex Scharfman
Cast: Paul Rudd, Jenna Ortega, Will Poulter, Téa Leoni, Richard E. Grant
Cinematography: Larry Fong
Editing: Ron Dulin
Score: Dan Romer, Giosuè Greco
Genre: Dark fantasy comedy horror
Runtime: 107 minutes

Keep your eyes on the wheel while driving. Unless you want to hit a unicorn.

This happens to Elliot (Rudd) on his way to his boss’ estate for a weekend trip, his teenage daughter Ridley (Ortega) in tow. The creature, in pain and oozing purple blood out of the wound, is promptly ended by a thwack from an implement in Elliot’s hand. Ridley is more sympathetic and before the creature’s untimely end, touches its horn and experiences some kind of revelatory mental journey, curing her acne in the process.

They reach the residence – Elliot’s boss, Odell (Richard E. Grant) is dying of cancer. As soon as Odell realises the remarkable healing powers the unicorn brings, we have a house divided. Odell, his wife (Tea Leoni), his brattish son (Will Poulter) and a reluctant Elliot decide to grind the horn down to make a cure. For the good of humanity. Ridley stands as the sole voice of compassion towards the magical creatures.

It runs like a twisted, adult, gory fairytale: over-the-top evil schemers, mystical beings. Heck, there’s a moment where Ridley is wandering through the forest wearing a vermilion hoodie as if she’s Little Red Riding Hood. And the moral takeaway: insatiable greed turns us, the humans, into the monsters.

The unicorns aren’t out of kids’ picture books – don’t expect fluffy ‘My Little Pony‘ types prancing joyfully. When provoked, they’re snarling, ferocious beasts. No horsing around here: they get straight to the point, to the detriment of a few unfortunate people. A schmaltzy ending balances out the bloodshed witnessed onscreen.

My rating: 7 / 10

The Woman in the Yard (2025)

Director: Jaume Collet-Serra
Screenplay: Sam Stefanek
Cast: Danielle Deadwyler, Okwui Okpokwasili, Russell Hornsby, Peyton Jackson, Estella Kahiha
Cinematography: Pawel Pogorzelski
Editing: Timothy Alverson, Krisztian Majdik
Score: Lorne Balfe
Genre: Psychological horror
Runtime: 87 minutes

Ramona (Danielle Deadwyler), on crutches following a car crash that killed her husband, cares for her two children in a farmhouse in the middle of nowhere. One day, a woman appears on their property, swathed in black like the Grim Reaper, her face obscured by a veil. Just sitting there, patiently. We don’t find out who this person is or what they represent for a good chunk of the film, most of that time is spent by Ramona trying her best to keep her son from approaching this mysterious figure, to no avail.

A shallow attempt to convey a message about grief and guilt wrapped up in the skin of a horror flick, ‘The Woman in the Yard‘ is a disappointment considering the filmography of director Jaume Collet-Serra. He did direct ‘Orphan‘ and ‘House of Wax‘ but has focused on action thrillers in the past 15 years (‘Unknown‘, ‘Non-Stop‘, ‘Run All Night‘, ‘The Commuter‘ – he’s obviously a friend of Liam Neeson) so perhaps he’s forgotten how to craft a decent horror movie in the intervening period.

After a moderately eerie atmosphere is created, it descends into sheer and utter madness in its final third. Deadwyler does what she can with the sub-par material but cannot save things. For a runtime of only 87 minutes, it feels as though it went on for twice as long. At this rate, I’d be running towards the woman and risking an uncertain fate if it meant this nightmare would end.

My rating: 4 / 10

A Working Man (2025)

Director: David Ayer
Screenplay: Sylvester Stallone, David Ayer
Cast: Jason Statham, Michael Peña, David Harbour
Cinematography: Shawn White
Editing: Fred Raskin
Score: Jared Michael Fry
Genre: Action thriller
Runtime: 116 minutes

In Jason Statham and director David Ayer’s second collaboration in two years (after last year’s ‘The Beekeeper‘), Statham plays Levon Cade, an ex-Royal Marines commando now employed in the construction business who has to utilise the tricks of his previous trade when the teenage daughter of his boss is kidnapped on a night out. The subject matter is right up Ayer’s street, he’s ex-military too; serving as a submarine sonar technician in the United States Navy.

In the course of his recovery mission, Levon gets caught up with Russian gangsters and dodgy drug dealers. It would be better if he’d made quick work of his objective and just shot everyone he met on sight – then we’d get to wrap things up early because jeez, that runtime sure does drag on.

While based on the novel ‘Levon’s Trade’ by Chuck Dixon (best known for being a comic book writer), it’s been adapted for the screen by Sylvester Stallone, Statham’s ‘Expendables’ co-star. Stallone, aware of Statham’s complete lack of acting chops, cuts out the bulk of what Levon tick (he’s got a young daughter, a dead wife, and hints of PTSD) and lets Statham do what he does well – his po-faced action man routine. He’s the titular blue-collar ‘working man’ – all work and no play makes Levon a dull boy; thanks to a personality bypass, he’s already there.

Was I thrilled? No. Did it hold my attention even on a mindless level? Nyet. I say dasvidaniya to thee.

My rating: 4 / 10

Novocaine (2025)

Director: Dan Berk, Robert Olsen
Screenplay: Lars Jacobson
Cast: Jack Quaid, Amber Midthunder, Ray Nicholson, Betty Gabriel, Matt Walsh, Jacob Batalon
Cinematography: Jacques Jouffret
Editing: Christian Wagner
Score: Lorne Balfe, Andrew Kawczynski
Genre: Action comedy
Runtime: 110 minutes

Nathan Caine (Quaid) can’t feel pain. That’s his deal. His special power. He suffers from CIP – a congenital insensitivity to pain. It makes him a superhero of sorts, his identity complete with a name, his middle school moniker: Novocaine, like the anaesthetic drug.

All superheroes have an ordinary life as a cover story. Nathan’s is that he works as an assistant manager at a bank. He’s smitten by his co-worker, Sherry (Midthunder) but when she gets taken hostage by robbers, Nathan takes it upon himself to rescue Sherry, with messy results. Break a leg, Novocaine! (Not that he’d even register if that happened). Nathan needs to remember this condition doesn’t make him immortal so he can’t afford to have too cavalier an attitude. No pain, no gain? Well, not quite in this case.

It’s a delightfully diverting action romp which fully delivers on the madcap premise at every given opportunity. I think I laughed as much as I winced – more than a dozen times. You’d expect to become desensitised to seeing an implement plunging into Nathan’s body after the umpteenth time yet I still recoiled with horror.

There’s plenty of set up at the start to develop the characters enough for you to root for them and great comedic performances from man of the moment Jack Quaid, Midthunder and Ray Nicholson (the spitting image of his father Jack) as the lead goon. As you’d imagine, there’s gobs of gore as Nathan is battered, bruised, burnt and beaten. He’s in hot water – literally at one point, scalding his hand. Ouch!

My rating: 8 / 10

Holland (2025)

Director: Mimi Cave
Screenplay: Andrew Sodorski
Cast: Nicole Kidman, Gael García Bernal, Matthew Macfadyen, Jude Hill
Cinematography: Pawel Pogorzelski
Editing: Martin Pensa
Score: Alex Somers
Genre: Psychological thriller
Runtime: 108 minutes

Ah, Holland. Tulips aplenty, windmill blades rotating indefatigably, clogs adorn people’s feet. Oh, this isn’t the Holland you’re thinking of. This is Holland, Michigan – a city founded by Dutch Protestants upon arrival in the area in the mid 1800s. A place proud of its heritage, the traditions of their forefathers are still upheld by 21st century residents.

One of these customs is the annual Tulip Time Festival, celebrating the Dutch flower with a costumed parade. In small town America, any excuse to let your hair down isn’t taken – not when so many neighbourhood eyes are watching you and there’s the constant pressure to keep up appearances. Fred and Nancy Vandergroot are notable members of their community – Fred (Macfadyen) is an optometrist whilst Nancy (Kidman) teaches at the local school. They live the picture-perfect existence (cue whimsical score) with their son Harry (Jude Hill, the breakout performance of 2021’s ‘Belfast‘).

Fred takes frequent trips away with ‘work’ so naturally, Nancy gets suspicious of his whereabouts. “Is he having an affair?”, she wonders to her fellow teacher Dave (García Bernal), who she ropes in to help her with an investigation. Nancy and Dave’s *ahem* closeness threatens to overshadow the central mystery but we’re soon back on track looking for clues.

The setting is the year 2000 (as evidenced by pagers and box televisions) but there’s an overhanging feeling of something even more retro (as if 2000 could be considered vintage anyway, don’t make me feel old); Holland has this 60s Americana vibe to it – the town time forgot. Nancy worked so hard to fit in here that doing anything out of line might erase her oh-so-perfect life. It’s no wonder she’s plagued by gloriously hallucinatory nightmares.

Quirkily shot through the use of Fred’s train set and replica model of Holland, Mimi Cave’s film is like a weathered thriller novel; a little frayed at the edges, maybe the last page has been torn out yet it’s worth a read just the same.

My rating: 6 / 10

In the Lost Lands (2025)

Director: Paul W.S. Anderson
Screenplay: Constantin Werner
Cast: Dave Bautista, Milla Jovovich, Arly Jover
Cinematography: Glen MacPherson
Editing: Niven Howie
Score: Paul Haslinger
Genre: Epic dark fantasy
Runtime: 101 minutes

A George R.R. Martin short story stretched out into a feature length film, ‘In the Lost Lands’ follows a witch, Gray Alys, tasked by a queen to acquire the powers of a werewolf by killing a shapeshifter. To succeed in her quest, Alys (Jovovich), must traverse the treacherous post-apocalyptic wilderness (the titular ‘Lost Lands’) with the aid of a hunter, Boyce (Bautista).

It’s a peculiar hybrid of quasi-medieval fantasy and a Western, so it seems ridiculous that whenever someone brandishes a sword, Boyce merely whips out his gun and shoots them dead.

Bautista has slimmed down since his playing the hulking Drax in the ‘Guardians of the Galaxy‘ series and with this weight loss comes a deficiency of onscreen presence. It puts me in mind of the biblical Samson after his haircut. I mean, he doesn’t exactly have any acting chops to rely on to command attention. Imagine if Arnold Schwarzenegger didn’t possess his gym-built physique – he’d be reduced to just a guy with a thick Austrian accent. Milla Jovovich, the other lead, is only there because her husband is the director (as is the case for most of his films, the ‘Resident Evil‘ franchise included). She hasn’t learned how to close her mouth, which is incredibly distracting – and she sports facial tattoos.

Dingy and dull, I didn’t care whether the characters lived or died. With all this talk of the mystical ‘Lost Lands’, what I wanted to know was: what else was lost? The plot? Decent dialogue? The ability to craft a movie that didn’t underwhelm me? A lost cause, for sure.

My rating: 4 / 10

Opus (2025)

Director: Mark Anthony Green
Screenplay: Mark Anthony Green
Cast: Ayo Edebiri, John Malkovich, Juliette Lewis, Murray Bartlett, Amber Midthunder
Cinematography: Tommy Maddox-Upshaw
Editing: Ernie Gilbert
Score: Danny Bensi, Saunder Jurriaans
Genre: Psychological thriller
Runtime: 104 minutes

Moretti is back. Three words spark a fire across social media.

Pop icon Alfred Moretti (John Malkovich) returns after a 30 year hiatus with a new record, projected to be the ‘greatest album in history, past or future’ by his fans. They’ve obviously not listened to anything by Yoko Ono.

Music journalist Ariel (Ayo Edebiri, from ‘The Bear‘) is one of six people chosen to attend Moretti’s compound for an exclusive listen to the album. As the group enter through the gates, superfans wait outside to get a glimpse of the man himself. Everyone, bar Ariel, seems to be Moretti-mad; they’re part of a cult.

I didn’t understand the hype either – the songs (in reality created by Nile Rodgers) were forgettable and Moretti didn’t possess any presence worth fawning over. Not Malkovich’s strongest work to date. Maybe he should’ve studied Jim Jones.

This is Mark Anthony Green’s directorial debut; it’s a vivid affair; the sect members clad in blues of different shades (is the colour blue to Moretti what purple was to Prince?). The stage is set for your bog standard thriller; creepy children, a disturbing puppet show, a sense of dread pervading the air.

However, I’m not too sure what Green is trying to say with this project. Cults are bad? Okay. Is this a satire on the obsessive nature of music aficionados? If so, he could’ve made a documentary about Taylor Swift stans instead. Edebiri turns in a good performance, the score adds to the uneasiness and up-and-comer Amber Midthunder is terrifying as Ariel’s concierge, assigned to be a human shadow. If there was a deeper meaning, it got lost in the unnecessary violence.

My rating: 5 / 10

Black Bag (2025)

Director: Steven Soderbergh
Screenplay: David Koepp
Cast: Cate Blanchett, Michael Fassbender, Marisa Abela, Tom Burke, Naomie Harris, Regé-Jean Page, Pierce Brosnan
Cinematography: Steven Soderbergh
Editing: Mary Ann Bernard
Score: David Holmes
Genre: Spy thriller
Runtime: 94 minutes

Many couples enjoy a little gossip about the neighbours in bed. Or discuss suburban trivialities: “Did you remember to put the bins out?”

But what if the pair are special agents? I can imagine the conversation going along the lines of: “And who did you take out today?” – “Oh, just some Iranian terrorist clutching a hand grenade. Nothing wild.”. An interesting dynamic; more undercover, less under the covers.

A few topics are off-limits. They can’t share everything with one another. The code words for terminating such conversations: ‘black bag’. The only way they could operate as a couple is by a rule of silence when any questions should arise and a foundation of faith in their relationship.

There’s a mole in the organisation. Intelligence agent George (Michael Fassbender) has 5 suspects to sort through to find the traitor. One of these people is his wife, Kathryn (Cate Blanchett). Does she have in it her to betray her country? To deceive her husband? She’s loyal to him; she’d kill for him. But would she tell him the truth?

A stellar lineup of supporting players; Marisa Abela, Tom Burke, Naomie Harris, Regé-Jean Page. Each of them is a flawed character – though it’s worth noting how Kathryn’s devotion to her partner is not so much an asset as a weakness. Ripe for exploitation.

Amazing camerawork from director Steven Soderbergh, especially the dinner scene near the start where George assembles the group around the table to ‘throw the stone and watch the ripples’, with the lighting adding a touch of intimacy. ‘Black Bag‘ is twisty like a serpent with plenty of bite. Bitesize too, at 94 minutes. I’m planning on seeing it twice; a single viewing wasn’t enough to absorb all the dialogue and nuance.

My rating: 8 / 10

Marching Powder (2025)

Director: Nick Love
Screenplay: Nick Love
Cast: Danny Dyer, Stephanie Leonidas, Calum MacNab
Cinematography: Simon Stolland
Editing: Pani Scott
Score: Alfie Godfrey
Genre: Comedy
Runtime: 96 minutes

Ah, the ‘c word’. Not ‘cocaine’, on display in copious amounts here. Nor is it ‘cockney’. Or ‘cringe’, though that fits best. I shan’t spell out the real word – if you want to hear it fired in quick succession like a machine gun with Tourette’s, go see ‘Marching Powder‘; it’s about an absolute sod, Jack Jones (Danny Dyer), who has an addiction to drugs and zero self-control. He has a wife too, treated like an afterthought. What she sees in him is anyone’s guess.

Following a brawl with rival football supporters, Jack faces a prison sentence unless he can prove to the court he can turn his life around. What does he do? He picks another fight. He snorts another line of crack. Every time he comes within a 5 mile radius of cleaning up his act, he self-sabotages, paying his old friend nose candy a visit. So much coke was inhaled, I was worried he’d end up resembling Danniella Westbrook.

Danny Dyer is definitely no actor, his fourth wall breaks make it seem as if he’s presenting his life story, if it were the most pathetic biography ever told. A Wikipedia entry doesn’t even exist (at time of writing), as if to say ‘we don’t wish to soil our site with this filth’.

This movie didn’t do anything for me. Wait, that’s not strictly true – it polluted my ears with its incessant swearing. It’s the type of thing that would appeal to a certain ilk; the beer swigging, non-woke men you’d find chanting and cheering their favourite footy team at the pub with the lads.

The short runtime of 96 minutes felt like a stretch; we get it – he’s a loser beyond the point of redemption. It reminded me of something I flushed down the toilet. Did not leave me in ‘high spirits’.

My rating: 3 / 10

Mickey 17 (2025)

Director: Bong Joon Ho
Screenplay: Bong Joon Ho
Cast: Robert Pattinson, Naomi Ackie, Steven Yeun, Toni Collette, Mark Ruffalo
Cinematography: Darius Khondji
Editing: Yang Jin-mo
Score: Jung Jae-il
Genre: Science fiction black comedy
Runtime: 137 minutes

‘Oh Mickey, you’re so fine.

You’re so fine, you keep on dyin’.

Hey Mickey, hey Mickey.’

Which Mickey though? Mickey Barnes’ luck has run out on Planet Earth and with no options left, gets recruited to work as an ‘expendable’ in a colonising space mission. With all his memories and personality quirks intact (saved in a high-tech brick), Mickey’s body is merely a tool; used until no longer deemed necessary (upon the point of death), incinerated in a furnace, then printed out by a cloning device ad infinitum. He’s stabbed, gassed, poisoned, used as a guinea pig to manufacture an antidote – you name it. ‘What does it feel like to die?’, pretty much everyone asks him.

With moments of black humour, Bong Joon Ho’s epic science fiction fable (his first feature since ‘Parasite‘) muses on mortality – removing the idea of finality of life makes these expendables (or ‘print jobs’) less human, more akin to recyclable cattle. Mickey is told he’s special when he’s freshly printed but his existence is meaningless and he’s consigned to gruelling labour and eating bland food – what’s so special about it?

In fact, he suffers an accident during an assignment on the icy world Nilfheim and scientists have already generated the next iteration before the previous one has been declared dead, leading to a case of ‘multiples’. They’re not twins, they are the same person in two corporeal forms. As if he’s looking in a mirror.

Robert Pattinson is great in the dual role of Mickeys 17 and 18. The entire cast delivers strong performances; Naomi Ackie as a ballsy security officer (and Mickey’s love interest), Mark Ruffalo as the egotistical head of the colony and Toni Collette as his Lady Macbeth-style wife with an obsession with sauce. The second half delves into the political side of the expedition, with Ruffalo’s character taking centre stage, a little too reminiscent of a certain president. Gorgeously shot throughout, there may be multiple Mickeys, but there’s only one Bong Joon Ho.

My rating: 9 / 10

Kinda Pregnant (2025)

Director: Tyler Spindel
Screenplay: Julie Paiva, Amy Schumer
Cast: Amy Schumer, Jillian Bell, Brianne Howey, Will Forte
Cinematography: Stuart Dryburgh
Editing: Stuart Dryburgh
Score: Rupert Gregson-Williams
Genre: Comedy
Runtime: 98 minutes

Unprofessional teacher Lainy Newton (Amy Schumer) has always wanted to be a mother. So when her bestie Kate (Jillian Bell) gets pregnant before her, Lainy feels jealous of her and also of another expectant mom, her work colleague Shirley, who’s much younger than her. Lainy is in her 40s, which doesn’t help matters, so decides to don a fake belly to live the pregnancy experience the easy way.

Compliments are offered from pedestrians, commuters give up their seats on the subway. It’s all of the perks of gestation without the rampant hormones, morning sickness and weird cravings. Of course people would think Amy Schumer was preggers for real; her face is bloated enough to convince you she’s with child. Talk about having a bun in the oven – she’s eaten the whole damn bakery.

While the humour (comprised of pratfalls and a constant barrage of smut) definitely doesn’t land, the simply outrageous premise keeps your eyes glued to the screen. Can Lainy keep this charade up in front of her new friend Megan (yet another pregnant woman) and love interest Josh (Will Forte)? Lie upon lie, spinning out a tangled spider’s web; each untruth making the situation even more ridiculous to the point Lainy resorts to shoving a turkey up her jumper as a makeshift bump.

Given Schumer’s résumé, it shocked me how tolerable it was. Faint praise indeed. I mean, she has zero comic timing but I was expecting something way worse. This ‘comedy’ (coated in Netflix’s glossy high production values) was strangely watchable. I must be ill.

My rating: 6 / 10

Heart Eyes (2025)

Director: Josh Ruben
Screenplay: Phillip Murphy, Christopher Landon, Michael Kennedy
Cast: Olivia Holt, Mason Gooding, Gigi Zumbado, Michaela Watkins, Devon Sawa, Jordana Brewster
Cinematography: Stephen Murphy
Editing: Brett W. Bachman
Score: Jay Wadley
Genre: Romantic comedy slasher
Runtime: 97 minutes

We have slashers for nearly every holiday – Halloween (obviously), Christmas (‘Terrifier 3‘, ‘Black Christmas‘), St. Patrick’s Day (the ‘Leprechaun‘ series), even Thanksgiving (with 2023’s film baring the name of said celebration). It’s about time we got a Valentine’s Day-themed horror flick, the concept is ripe for exploitation.

The Heart Eyes Killer (HEK for short), so called because of the heart-shaped eye sockets on the stitched-up mask they wear, has been terrorising cities in the U.S. for the last two years. Their modus operandi: butchering only those in relationships. Singletons fear not!

Advertising executive Ally (Olivia Holt), who is newly single, bumps heads (literally) with the impossibly suave Jay (Mason Gooding, son of Cuba Gooding Jr. – Mason must get his looks from his mum) at a coffee shop. Later on, Ally meets her ex and his new girlfriend, and to save face in an awkward situation, pretends Jay is her boyfriend. She kisses him to prove her point. But this is witnessed by Heart Eyes who mistakes them for a genuine couple.

The dialogue is the highlight, it’s snappy and some real zingers are thrown around. Two of the supporting actors steal the movie from under the leads’ noses; Gigi Zumbado as Ally’s friend/co-worker, and Michaela Watkins as their boss Crystal Cane – they both have such onscreen charm and deliver their lines with pizzazz.

I actually really enjoyed it, but I felt it came undone thanks to the uber theatrical resolution. The cinema was full of twosomes on date nights when I went to see it; I’m pretty sure I was the only one sitting on their own. If Heart Eyes is purely on the hunt for couples, I count myself relieved.

My rating: 7 / 10

The Monkey (2025)

Director: Osgood Perkins
Screenplay: Osgood Perkins
Cast: Theo James, Tatiana Maslany, Christian Convery, Colin O’Brien, Rohan Campbell, Sarah Levy, Adam Scott, Elijah Wood
Cinematography: Nico Aguilar
Editing: Greg Ng, Graham Fortin
Score: Edo Van Breemen
Genre: Comedy horror
Runtime: 98 minutes

Coming only 7 months after his last feature, ‘Longlegs’, Osgood Perkins returns with a tale of murder and mayhem all caused by a toy monkey. Y’know, one of those insanely creepy monkeys with the drum kits. It’s not a toy though, it’s a killing machine. Every time someone winds it up, certain death shall follow. And always the most gruesome, chaotic deaths, giving ‘Final Destination’ a run for its money. It’s comedically over-the-top, but that’s the intention.

When their pilot father brings the monkey back from a trip elsewhere, twins Hal and Bill (both played by Christian Convery) discover the curse at the expense of innocent family members. A decent chunk of the movie is devoted to the boys’ childhood living in the shadow of constant expiration, as opposed to a rushed 5 minute recollection of their backstories. 25 years later, the brothers (now played by Theo James), are estranged, meanwhile the monkey is out there…lurking…because evil never dies.

Perkins seems to have an obsession with death but if you research his own parentage, you understand what makes him tick. His dad was Anthony Perkins of ‘Psycho’ fame, who died from AIDS-related pneumonia. His mother, Berry Berenson, an actress and model, was killed in a plane crash – a victim of 9/11, no less. The latter being totally preventable in a ‘sliding doors’ moment, say if Ms. Berenson had woken up late that morning and missed the flight. The movie’s message of ‘accidents happen’ becomes even more significant.

It’s certainly miles better than ‘Longlegs‘, which I found to be dreary and unimaginative. This may be due to the source material; the plot of ‘The Monkey‘ is based on a Stephen King short story. Hang around for a post-credits scene teasing Perkins’ next project, ‘Keeper’, set for release in October. He’s on a (drum) roll.

My rating: 7 / 10

Bridget Jones: Mad About the Boy (2025)

Director: Michael Morris
Screenplay: Helen Fielding, Dan Mazer, Abi Morgan
Cast: Renée Zellweger, Hugh Grant, Emma Thompson, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Leo Woodall, Colin Firth, Jim Broadbent
Cinematography: Suzie Lavelle
Editing: Mark Day
Score: Dustin O’Halloran
Genre: Romantic comedy
Runtime: 125 minutes

Mark Darcy is dead. Killed in a humanitarian mission in Sudan. Who will wear that hideous Christmas sweater?

Bridget Jones (Renée Zellweger, perfect posh British accent as ever) has matured significantly since the first two films. Gone are her hedonist 30s, along with watching her weight obsessively. After a third movie focusing on her pregnancy (and the speculation of which of her suitors was the father), she now has not one, but two kids by Mark Darcy. This is Bridget with baggage, struggling with the twin storms of parenting and widowhood, Darcy’s ghost looming large over her life (Colin Firth appearance as a spectre at appropriate points).

She still has the requisite ‘man trouble’; her dalliance with hunky park ranger Roxster (Leo Woodall) who is closer in age to her son, and her children’s strict teacher, Mr Walliker (Chiwetel Ejiofor).

The screenplay, co-written by series author Helen Fielding adapted from the book of the same name, hits the right balance between the exploration of grief and the prospect of moving forwards; I found it amusing, but not laugh out loud funny. The film is a veritable who’s who of British actors – Josette Simon, Gemma Jones, Celia Imrie, Joanna Scanlan. Isla Fisher has a cameo as Bridget’s neighbour, which feels like it was meant to be bigger part, a victim of the editing process perhaps?

This fourth chapter in the life of Ms. Jones ties up her story with a bow, so it’s unlikely we’ll see her again lest the dastardly Daniel Cleaver (Hugh Grant) meddles in her love life again.

My rating: 7 / 10

Captain America: Brave New World (2025)

Director: Julius Onah
Screenwriter: Rob Edwards, Malcolm Spellman, Dalan Musson, Julius Onah, Peter Glanz
Cast: Anthony Mackie, Danny Ramirez, Shira Haas, Carl Lumbly, Xosha Roquemore, Giancarlo Esposito, Tim Blake Nelson, Harrison Ford
Cinematography: Kramer Morgenthau
Editing: Matthew Schmidt, Madeleine Gavin
Score: Laura Karpman
Genre: Superhero
Runtime: 118 minutes

There’s a brave new world out there. And it needs a hero. It needs Captain America.

With fan favourite Steve Rogers (Chris Evans) having hung his shield up following the events of ‘Avengers: Endgame‘, the mantle was passed down to his sidekick Sam Wilson (Anthony Mackie), formerly known as ‘Falcon’. What may seem like a gigantic act to follow, I actually prefer Sam Wilson as Captain America – Rogers was too goody-goody; Wilson has an edge to him. He feels he has something to prove coming off the back of Rogers’ success. And he’s a ‘proper’ human, not an artificially enhanced ‘super soldier’ the same way the previous Cap was. He earns his victories through hard-fought combat. Everything good about Rogers came out of a bottle.

The title is curious choice: sure, we have a new lead actor, taking the ‘Captain America‘ series in a fresh direction. Yet with MCU blockbusters, especially this one, a history lesson is required to keep up with the lore. So not exactly a new world, not when the villain from 2008’s ‘The Incredible Hulk‘ (only the 2nd movie in the MCU) shows up, a total of 17 years later.

Not so much out with the old, but in with the new. With Wilson being upgraded to Captain America, we have a vacancy in the Falcon department. Enter Joaquin Torres (Danny Ramirez). He was already established in the Disney+ show ‘The Falcon and the Winter Soldier‘ but a couple of lines of dialogue lets casual viewers know the score. Same goes with Carl Lumbly’s character Isaiah Bradley, an army veteran and super soldier experimented on by the government. We have a new Thaddeus Ross too – the character was too central a cog in the overarching storyline so writing him off after the death of actor William Hurt was inconceivable. Instead, he’s recast with the legendary Harrison Ford, who has ample material to work with (the most Ross has been utilised since ‘Civil War‘) now that Ross is President of the United States (because even fictional presidents are in their 80s).

Overall, it’s enjoyable; less cheesy quips and more solid, dramatic set pieces, including an action-packed sequence in the Rose Garden. Stay for the post-credits scene teasing the Multiverse. Captain America is great again!

My rating: 7 / 10

Love Hurts (2025)

Director: Jonathan Eusebio
Screenplay: Matthew Murray, Josh Stoddard, Luke Passmore
Cast: Ke Huy Quan, Ariana DeBose, Daniel Wu, Marshawn Lynch, Mustafa Shakir, Lio Tipton, Rhys Darby, André Eriksen, Sean Astin
Cinematography: Bridger Nielson
Editing: Elísabet Ronaldsdóttir
Score: Dominic Lewis
Genre: Action comedy
Runtime: 83 minutes

Marvin Gable (Quan) has the perfect white picket fence existence; he bakes heart-shaped cookies, wears awful sweaters and his job as a realtor brings him the respect of the community. From almost everyone anyway, aside from a vandal defacing his advertisements. This person is Rose (DeBose), a reminder from Marvin’s previous occupation as an assassin, who he was sweet on. Her appearance on the scene threatens his chance at living an ordinary life as with her return comes his estranged brother Alvin ‘Knuckles’ Gable, seeking revenge for a past misdeed. ‘Love Hurts‘ is born of the same production line as ‘Nobody‘, another story of the ‘average Joe with a secret history as a killer’ so you know what to expect here.

Oscar winner Ke Huy Quan is a delight; a hybrid of adorkable charm and nifty fighting abilities. Ariana DeBose, on the other hand, is underused yet again – so soon after her talents were squandered in ‘Kraven the Hunter‘. The blend of comedy and action is inoffensive; if only the jokes hit as hard as the punches did. The muddled plot (stolen money, familial conflicts) is a distraction from what could be something much more fun than what the finished product turned out to be.

Heavily marketed as a Valentine’s Day date night movie through the overuse of the love heart motif, there’s a distinct lack of affection. I suggest you book tickets to see the latest installment in the ‘Bridget Jones‘ series in which you’re certainly guaranteed a bucketful of romance.

Love hurts, doesn’t it? Well this hurt my sensibilities.

My rating: 4 / 10

Presence (2024)

Director: Steven Soderbergh
Screenplay: David Koepp
Cast: Lucy Liu, Chris Sullivan, Callina Liang
Cinematography: Steven Soderbergh
Editing: Mary Ann Bernard
Score: Zack Ryan
Genre: Supernatural thriller drama
Runtime: 85 minutes

Director (and cinematographer) Steven Soderbergh takes the ‘haunted house’ tale and puts his spin on it. The entirety of the film is shot from the first-person perspective; the POV of an apparition wandering around; walking down the stairs, retreading those steps back upstairs – we’re getting a guided tour of the property complete with 360 degree panoramic shots of the rooms. The scenes are brief and end suddenly, darting forwards in time by a short interval.

A new family move into the suburban abode; a detached mother (Lucy Liu), an agitated father (Chris Sullivan), their swimming champ son and a daughter who’s recently lost her best friend and is struggling to cope with the pain. There’s a fifth member of the household, an unwelcome guest, a ghost in the machine…’the presence’, which only the daughter has the ability to sense.

We’ve got the usual poltergeist shenanigans; objects moving supposedly of their own accord, doors closing etc. yet this has more intrigue to it than the standard spooky fare. It’s quietly engrossing – what is going on exactly? Who is this mysterious spectre? Are they a manifestation of the girl’s grief perhaps? What do they want?

Points off for not fully exploring the premise – for example, the parents’ crumbling marriage could’ve been fleshed out and we don’t necessarily get answers to every question raised. Intriguingly filmed, ‘Presence‘ will continue to haunt after the screen fades to black.

My rating: 6 / 10

September 5 (2024)

Director: Tim Fehlbaum
Screenwriter: Moritz Binder, Tim Fehlbaum, Alex David
Cast: Peter Sarsgaard, John Magaro, Ben Chaplin, Leonie Benesch
Cinematography: Markus Förderer
Editing: Hansjörg Weißbrich
Score: Lorenz Dangel
Genre: Historical drama thriller
Runtime: 94 minutes

September 5th 1972. The eyes of the globe are on Munich, host city of the Summer Olympic Games, the first of such to be broadcast live (and in colour). It’s a Germany keen to improve their image post-World War II. The Palestinian terrorist organisation, Black September, have other ideas, taking the Israeli team hostage whilst demanding the freedom of Palestinian prisoners.

Unlike Steven Spielberg’s ‘Munich’, which focused on the revenge assassinations carried out by Mossad agents against those suspected of being Arab militants in the years after, the compelling ‘September 5’ delves right into the frenzy of the situation from the perspective of the ABC Sports crew tasked with broadcasting the Olympics; their job transformed from transmitting major moments like swimming champion Mark Spitz’s gold medal win to a mad scramble to report the unfolding drama before a rival TV channel can.

The timing of the film couldn’t be more apt – the thorny Arab-Israel conflict is still raging on, 50 years plus. As we witness events from the point of view of television staffers, we’re on neutral ground. What unfolds is a tragedy no matter what your religious/political leanings may be.

The time period is authentically captured; detuned lenses and the use of analogue technology – the workers had to do things painstakingly by hand, making their efforts all the more impressive (a whopping 900 million viewers watched the coverage). The lack of any ‘big name stars’ (aside from maybe Peter Sarsgaard) helps add an additional level of genuineness; almost as if these are real people thrown into circumstances they didn’t think they’d be dealing with when they woke up that morning.

It really was a ‘black’ September – 11 members of the Israeli Olympic sports team were killed (6 coaches and 5 athletes), as well as a German police officer.

My rating: 8 / 10

Flight Risk (2025)

Director: Mel Gibson
Screenplay: Jared Rosenberg
Cast: Mark Wahlberg, Michelle Dockery, Topher Grace
Cinematography: Johnny Derango
Editing: Steven Rosenblum
Score: Antonio Pinto
Genre: Action thriller
Runtime: 91 minutes

Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. If you take a look out the left window; you’ll spot a smouldering wreckage, formerly an attempt to create a high-octane thriller by director Mel Gibson and writer Jared Rosenberg. I guess it didn’t land well.

Set almost entirely in the tiny confines of a private airplane, ‘Flight Risk‘ is a three-hander between a garrulous, gum-chewing pilot (Mark Wahlberg), a U.S. Marshal (Michelle Dockery) and an accountant-turned-mob informer deemed a flight risk (Topher Grace) as the trio fly over the Alaskan mountains towards the state capital Anchorage, so the snitch can transfer to New York City to testify against his former employer. Wahlberg is charmless, Grace is incredibly annoying as the backseat passenger you wouldn’t want to be stuck on a journey with, while Dockery tries in vain to save the movie from absurdity.

There’s enough action content to keep your focus – it’s watchable if you’ve switched your brain off beforehand like I did (notice how I didn’t say it was enjoyable though). Not Boeing at all. Boring, I mean. Within such a small space, there’s only so many tricks up its sleeve and a limited number of times punches can be thrown before it gets tiresome. A tight 91 minute runtime keeps things on track and no time is wasted getting too invested in the characters. Probably for the best.

But when Mark Wahlberg spouts the line ‘I just made a Jackson Pollock in my pants’, you’ll be scrabbling around for a parachute.

My rating: 5 / 10

Companion (2025)

Director: Drew Hancock
Screenplay: Drew Hancock
Cast: Sophie Thatcher, Jack Quaid, Lukas Gage, Megan Suri, Harvey Guillen, Rupert Friend
Cinematography: Eli Born
Editing: Brett W. Bachman, Josh Ethier
Score: Hrishikesh Hirway
Genre: Science fiction thriller
Runtime: 97 minutes

The opening sequence of ‘Companion‘ put me in mind of the last scene of ‘The Stepford Wives’; a young woman pushing a trolley down the aisle of a grocery store, everything seems a little too immaculate, there’s a heightened sense of reality. When the woman, Iris (Sophie Thatcher), locks eyes with Josh (Jack Quaid), there’s an instant spark between them.

Josh takes his new ‘girlfriend’ Iris with him on a trip to a lake house to meet his friends – the twist: she’s a companion robot. She’s designed to serve her owner; to satisfy their every whim. Anything they want – she must cater for. The concept really exposes the solipsism of human nature. Via a smartphone, the user can modify the bot’s intelligence level, eye colour, voice, language, and personality to suit their fancy. Ethically abhorrent.

Hold on a minute. He’s fucking an android? How does that even work…anatomically? Where does he insert his…? Josh gives me the ick, so my sympathies lie with Iris when the shit hits the fan. She’s not so docile; she bytes. And she’s not chuffed as (micro)chips to be kept as Josh’s personal robotic sex slave.

A gripping, wild ride (predictable in parts); it flips the script on the tired ‘robot malfunctions and goes berserk’ trope, giving the mistreated automaton a consciousness; something resembling humanity. The faulty wiring instead lies with humankind; their insatiable greed is the root of any chaos caused, rather than the blame being placed on ‘bad tech’ as usual.

My rating: 7 / 10

Hard Truths (2024)

Director: Mike Leigh
Screenplay: Mike Leigh
Cast: Marianne Jean-Baptiste, Michele Austin, David Webber
Cinematography: Dick Pope
Editing: Tania Reddin
Score: Gary Yershon
Genre: Drama
Runtime: 97 minutes

Master of the mundane Mike Leigh returns with ‘Hard Truths’, a character study about a grouchy middle-aged woman, Pansy Deacon (Marianne Jean-Baptiste, star of Leigh’s critical acclaimed ‘Secrets & Lies‘), who is perpetually angry at people – berating shopworkers, picking verbal fights with customers waiting behind her in the supermarket queue. She literally wakes up shouting.

Unbelievably so, she has a (long suffering) husband and an overweight son (whose only escape from his mother’s wrath is by taking daily constitutionals around the block). Pansy and her sister Chantelle (Michele Austin) are like night and day; while Pansy rails against the world, Chantelle is warm and considerate. They could’ve come from two different planets.

Pansy is a sick woman – as she keeps on reminding us. Exhausted by chronic fatigue, crippled by social anxiety combined with an compulsive obsession with cleanliness, she’s being kept prisoner by her own illness. Obviously there’s something deeper than the basic surface-level anger; it’s akin to trauma, arising in outbursts of ire.

Jean-Baptiste delivers a masterclass in hostility; Pansy is a real force of nature and her brashness is amusing. She’s an active volcano prepared to erupt at some poor soul. Even in the moments of quiet, she commands the audience’s attention with the anticipation of what vitriol will spew out of her gob. Despite her unbridled rage, she’s not a monster – I have a lot of empathy with Pansy’s struggles with the general public. In fact, I’ve never related more to a fictional person.

My rating: 8 / 10

Back in Action (2025)

Director: Seth Gordon
Screenplay: Seth Gordon, Brendan O’Brien
Cast: Jamie Foxx, Cameron Diaz, Kyle Chandler, Glenn Close, Jamie Demetriou, Andrew Scott
Cinematography: Ken Seng
Editing: Peter S. Elliot
Score: Christopher Lennertz
Genre: Action comedy
Runtime: 114 minutes

After a botched mission to retrieve an all-powerful key (with the ability to control electronic systems), CIA agents Matt (Foxx) and Emily (Diaz) decide to go off the grid. It’s just as well – Emily is pregnant with Matt’s baby. Not exactly ideal for their line of work anyway. Jumping ahead 15 years, the pair are married and now have two children, living the suburban dream as overprotective parents – that is until their identities are compromised thanks to a very public brawl in a nightclub.

The title ‘Back in Action‘ could refer to our protagonists returning to the fold but also to Diaz, who took a hiatus from acting for a decade, her most recent credit was 2014’s ‘Annie‘. Was this project worth coming out of retirement for? I’d say so, yes.

While the fight sequences are slick and well choreographed (one of them amusingly to the tune of Dean Martin’s ‘Ain’t That A Kick in the Head‘), it adheres to the typical ‘twisty spy thriller’ formula, similar to last year’s Netflix Original ‘The Union‘ (which I really enjoyed), the only difference being the added family dynamic. Almost as if Netflix churns these movies out with slight variations; it wouldn’t take a superspy to spot that.

It’s great fun though, and nice to see Cameron Diaz once again gracing our screens. This ain’t just a one-off return for her – she’s got a couple of films in the pipeline; ‘Outcome‘, a black comedy with Keanu Reeves and Jonah Hill, and the much anticipated (and memed) ‘Shrek 5‘.

My rating: 7 / 10

Wolf Man (2025)

Director: Leigh Whannell
Screenplay: Leigh Whannell, Corbett Tuck
Cast: Christopher Abbott, Julia Garner, Matilda Firth, Sam Jaeger
Cinematography: Stefan Duscio
Editing: Andy Canny
Score: Benjamin Wallfisch
Genre: Horror
Runtime: 103 minutes

When writer Blake Lovell (Christopher Abbott) takes his workaholic wife, Charlotte (Julia Garner), and their daughter Ginger to the Oregon mountains where he spent his childhood to reconnect as a family unit away from the bustle of city life, the last thing he’d appreciate is being menaced by a werewolf.

On route things get hairy: Blake swerves off the road after seeing a humanoid figure standing there. In the aftermath of the crash, he’s slashed by a ‘wild animal’. Cue the standard transformation: a few hours later, he has become the titular ‘Wolf Man’. It’s a reboot of the classic Universal Pictures horror of 1941, given a modern day setting. The film is standalone, the plotted interconnected ‘Dark Universe‘ franchise featuring iconic ghouls such as Frankenstein’s Monster and Dr. Jekyll / Mr. Hyde having been scrapped in favour of one-off projects, like 2020’s ‘The Invisible Man‘ (also directed by Leigh Whannell).

By keeping it simple in terms of plot and location (one isolated farmhouse), this means there’s less material to work with. Once her husband turns into a wolf, all Charlotte really gets to do now is be chased through a pitch-black forest. So what? Your husband’s a werewolf? Big deal. I’ve known men with more body hair than that.

Trippy visuals where the camera slowly pans around to see events from Blake’s perspective grab your attention for a handful of seconds but this is your typical ‘January Jinx’ movie; predictably low quality and sent out by the studio to die. What a howler.

My rating: 4 / 10

Here (2024)

Director: Robert Zemeckis
Screenplay: Eric Roth, Robert Zemeckis
Cast: Tom Hanks, Robin Wright, Paul Bettany, Kelly Reilly
Cinematography: Don Burgess
Editing: Jesse Goldsmith
Score: Alan Silvestri
Genre: Drama
Runtime: 104 minutes

One house – various occupants. We observe multiple generations in a single space, even before the construction of the building (in a sequence involving the meteor that wiped out the dinosaurs) – all the drama unfolds within the same four walls, the camera positioned at the corner of the living room as a constant.

The main focus through the decades is the Young family, primarily Richard and his wife Margaret (Tom Hanks and Robin Wright, respectively), and by extension Richard’s parents, his war veteran father (Paul Bettany) and mother (Kelly Reilly). We catch glimpses of other eras; a budding aviator in the early 1900s, a free-spirited wartime couple, ultimately reaching the 2020s (as evidenced by face masks and elbow-bumping).

The storytelling is non-linear – as we hop between times (as depicted by décor and music), a white-outlined square appears onscreen and holds the action inside as everything else in shot gradually shifts around. It’s a little scattered but I appreciate the inventive device to change the environment from one time period to another.

‘Here’ reunites the team behind Academy Award favourite ‘Forrest Gump’; director Robert Zemeckis, screenwriter Eric Roth, actors Hanks and Wright, plus composer Alan Silvestri for a kindred jaunt into pop culture history.

For ethical reasons, I believe the so-called ‘digital de-aging’ used should be forbidden; it makes people look like they’re in a video game cutscene. This unconvincing technology only hinders the film when the characters are in the foreground, which is a small portion of the runtime but jarring nonetheless. You’re expecting me to suspend my disbelief and imagine Tom Hanks is playing a 20-something year old despite having the vocal tones of someone triple his age. It’s tantamount to casting grown adults to play teenagers.

Life is celebrated here – the bliss shared, the hardships suffered, births, deaths, ad infinitum; and while sappy, it’s coming from the right place.

My rating: 7 / 10

Maria (2024)

Director: Pablo Larraín
Screenplay: Steven Knight
Cast: Angelina Jolie, Pierfrancesco Favino, Alba Rohrwacher, Haluk Bilginer, Kodi Smit-McPhee
Cinematography: Edward Lachman
Editing: Sofía Subercaseaux
Genre: Biographical psychological drama
Runtime: 124 minutes

How do you solve a problem like Maria?

This Maria – La Divina herself, the world famous opera singer Maria Callas – is troubled; she has a narcotics addiction, her vocal abilities are in decline and she’s beset by hallucinations. One such vision is of ‘Andrax’, a young reporter (who shares his name with a drug she’s dependent on). He’s come to walk with her through her life, down leafy Paris streets, in the last seven days before her death aged 53.

Ms. Callas is the third 20th century female icon Pablo Larraín has put under the spotlight, after Jacqueline Kennedy in ‘Jackie‘ (2016) and Princess Diana in ‘Spencer‘ (2021). Jolie’s Maria (performing 5% of the operatic vocals, the rest is lip-synced to the real Maria’s voice) is regal, enigmatic, and her accent an odd hybrid of English and somewhat ‘European’.

The film, separated into three acts and a curtain call similar to an opera, goes a little way into exploring what makes her tick but this all feels too shallow; we’re only scratching away a thin layer of an incredibly complex personality.

It’s a huge case of style over substance; an abundance of opulence and elegance; with Callas’ past triumphs on stage artfully depicted in black and white. However, I lost interest; I felt as though I was wading in the midst of mud, trudging around in search of the nearest escape. ‘Maria‘ inched along at the pace of a sloth, albeit one that was dressed to the nines in a satin gown. Ave Maria!

My rating: 5 / 10

Babygirl (2024)

Director: Halina Reijn
Screenplay: Halina Reijn
Cast: Nicole Kidman, Harris Dickinson, Sophie Wilde, Antonio Banderas
Cinematography: Jasper Wolf
Editing: Matthew Hannam
Score: Cristobal Tapia de Veer
Genre: Erotic thriller
Runtime: 115 minutes

In her second ‘cougar’ role in the past 12 months (the other being ‘A Family Affair‘), Nicole Kidman is Romy Mathis, a high-up CEO of a tech firm (which concerns itself with reducing the number of human factory workers in favour of robots etc., a minor detail). She has a swanky apartment, two daughters and a loving husband (Antonio Banderas). Yet this obviously isn’t enough for her – he doesn’t satisfy her sexually. Along comes an intern half her age, Samuel (Harris Dickinson), who awakens the kinky side she’d never thought she’d get to indulge in. He holds the keys – one little phone call would bring her world crashing down. For Romy, the threat is the allure.

‘Babygirl‘ does not strike me as a ‘feminist’ piece of filmmaking – sure, Romy has agency; she could risk everything and walk away. Alas, she opts to degrade herself, getting on all fours and drinking milk out of a saucer on the floor of a seedy hotel (weird kink but okay). She’s ultimately doing this because ‘the man’ in this situation orders her to. It was her choice to cross that line and betray her husband’s trust in the first place though. I find my sympathy for Romy severely limited; maybe she’s into humiliation but dishonouring her marriage vows isn’t sexy.

I’m no prude – but the sexual content made me uncomfortable. I guess I’m vanilla. In that case, Romy must be triple chocolate chip with a Cadbury Flake on top. Still compelling nevertheless, perhaps since I was eager to see if her life would implode.

And if we’re talking about stiff things in the bedroom, have you seen Nicole Kidman’s face? Yikes.

My rating: 6 / 10

We Live in Time (2024)

Director: John Crowley
Screenplay: Nick Payne
Cast: Andrew Garfield, Florence Pugh
Cinematography: Stuart Bentley
Editing: Justine Wright
Score: Bryce Dessner
Genre: Romantic drama
Runtime: 108 minutes

Take:

one plot.

Add:

a dollop of sentimentality.

a pinch of laugh out loud moments.

an ounce of hard-hitting reality.

Stir it all in a bowl, bake in the oven for 108 minutes – and voilà – you’ve got the touching story of a couple who navigate the chaos of illness and pregnancy, retaining warmth at its core.

Employing a non-linear structure, ‘We Live in Time‘ centres on chef Almut Brühl (Pugh) and Weetabix representative Tobias Durand (Garfield) (as to why they’ve randomly got Continental European-sounding names is anyone’s guess) and the decade they spend together. They meet when Almut runs Tobias down as he tries to cross a road at night whilst on the hunt for pens to sign divorce papers – not exactly the typical first date at Nando’s.

The timey-wimey narrative makes it a smidge confusing as to whereabouts they are in the timeline if not already spelled out to us viewers. Within the opening five minutes of the movie… *boom* Almut is suddenly pregnant …*boom* she’s now been diagnosed with cancer (the early reveal softens the blow a little, as opposed to a weepy second act revelation). It’s an unconventional approach to the usual ‘boy meets girl’ concept, a reflection of the unpredictable nature of life. You never know what’s going to hit you next (unless it’s Almut with her car again).

Other characters fade into the background – the film is carried by two engaging performances from Pugh and Garfield, the pair have a natural chemistry. Even though Almut’s fate is sealed at the beginning, you still root for the couple in spite of insurmountable odds.

Bring a box of tissues with you in case.

My rating: 8 / 10

A Real Pain (2024)

Director: Jesse Eisenberg
Screenplay: Jesse Eisenberg
Cast: Jesse Eisenberg, Kieran Culkin, Will Sharpe, Jennifer Grey
Cinematography: Michal Dymek
Editing: Robert Nassau
Genre: Buddy road comedy-drama
Runtime: 90 minutes

You wouldn’t think the combination of a comedy-drama and a tour of a concentration camp would work but under the deft writing of Jesse Eisenberg (who also directs and stars), the two opposing forces of humour and sorrow don’t swamp each other; the former is used effectively to balance out the heavy subject matter.

A pair of American Jewish cousins, David (Eisenberg) and Benji (Kieran Culkin, often hilarious) embark on a trip to Poland to honour the memory of their recently deceased grandmother. As part of a group of fellow Jews, they visit the Grodzka Gate, the Old Jewish Cemetery and lastly, the Majdanek concentration camp. But for the boys, their final stop is to see their gran’s house to reconnect with their roots.

Benji is gregarious, with no filter and wears his heart on his sleeve. By contrast, David is more reserved, uptight and envious of Benji’s effortless ability to integrate himself socially. The duo are both grieving for their grandmother – David doesn’t display it as externally, but that’s the nature of grief; we all process it in our own unique ways, it doesn’t make the feeling less valid than someone who was bawling their eyes out.

Their pain is a microcosm of the horrors their forebears endured, which really puts things in perspective – what is a ‘real‘ pain exactly? As the bunch are travelling first class on a train, Benji makes a thoughtful point about how they live in luxury while their ancestors were treated like cattle, suffering in terrible agony during the Holocaust.

When the group visit the Warsaw Uprising Monument (which depicts courageous Polish World War II resistance fighters), the tour guide highlights the fact these bronze men are striking back, not being meekly led to their deaths – a reminder of a show of strength in the face of antisemitism.

An interesting look at personal anguish, well acted throughout by the two leads.

My rating: 8 / 10

Nosferatu (2024)

Director: Robert Eggers
Screenplay: Robert Eggers
Cast: Bill Skarsgard, Nicholas Hoult, Lily-Rose Depp, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Emma Corrin, Ralph Ineson, Simon McBurney, Willem Dafoe
Cinematography: Jarin Blaschke
Editing: Louise Ford
Score: Robin Carolan
Genre: Gothic horror
Runtime: 132 minutes

The silent horror ‘Nosferatu‘ (1922) is given the big screen remake treatment by gothic auteur Robert Eggers (‘The Lighthouse‘, ‘The Northman‘). The concept of Nosferatu was created as a way of honouring Bram Stoker’s classic vampire novel ‘Dracula‘ without infringing on copyright laws, thus, character names were changed and the setting moved to mountainous Germany.

An estate agent, Thomas Hutter (Nicholas Hoult), is tasked by his employer to sell a crumbling manor to the mysterious Count Orlok – in doing so, he must travel (by phantom carriage, naturally) to the Count’s castle in the Carpathian mountains. Upon their meeting, the nocturnal Orlok displays a taste for human blood…and a fascination for Hutter’s new bride, Ellen (Lily-Rose Depp, overacting to the max).

As the original was silent (although accompanied by a musical score), this all-screaming, all-biting version allows the narrative to be fleshed out, with a deeper exploration of emotions. Though with the inclusion of words, it risks becoming a tad verbose – my interest started to wane when the dialogue threatened to mar the eerie atmosphere. Likewise whenever my eyes witnessed any unnecessary nudity. I had fears that giving the formerly mute Count Orlok a voice would diminish his power but Bill Skarsgard’s vocal presence assured me otherwise; the character design was more zombified German nobleman, less pointy-eared, wide-eyed space creature.

The film’s colour palette is drained of warmth, as if it too had been sucked dry by the fangs of a vampire – a certain chill in the air can be felt while viewing the gorgeously bleak visuals.

The antecedent ‘Nosferatu‘ (available to watch on Amazon Prime of all places) still holds up as a body of work a whole century later (an incredible feat). Will 2024’s overlong ode to vampirism endure in the public consciousness for a similar hundred? Wake me from my coffin and let me know when the time comes.

My rating: 6 / 10

Kraven the Hunter (2024)

Director: J.C. Chandor
Screenplay: Richard Wenk, Art Marcum, Matt Holloway
Cast: Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Ariana DeBose, Fred Hechinger, Alessandro Nivola, Christopher Abbott, Russell Crowe
Cinematography: Ben Davis
Editing: Chris Lebenzon, Craig Wood
Score: Benjamin Wallfisch, Evgueni Galperine, Sacha Galperine
Genre: Superhero
Runtime: 127 minutes

Sony’s Spider-Man Universe (the SSU for short) has paled in comparison to Marvel’s MCU and even DC’s DCEU (which had its fair share of duds). With only six films in its catalog, ‘Kraven the Hunter‘ is the final nail in the coffin, following on from the disastrous ‘Madame Web‘ earlier this year, which left the SSU on life support, and while the ‘Venom‘ series was popular, each entry was noticeably weaker than the previous.

‘Kraven‘ was actually filmed in 2022, and now released after multiple delays. There’s an air of doom hanging over this movie; as if it’s an imperilled afterthought – the makers didn’t really care about it to put any actual effort in. And it shows; a half-baked plot, underdeveloped characters and underutilised superpowers (the ability to slow down time, chameleon-like mimicry).

Our titular hero (Aaron Taylor-Johnson), the son of a Russian gangster (Russell Crowe, playing the epitome of toxic masculinity), learns of his mother’s suicide in his teenagehood. His way of grieving: running away from home and spending 16 years in the Siberian wilderness, seemingly able to fend for himself. Another inexplicable thing to happen to him: he was mauled by a lion and resurrected with voodoo. Okay then. In the present day, he spends his days hunting poachers and other threats to nature, he’s something of an animal lover. He has a list of targets – the one way to get off it…is death.

Mr. Taylor-Johnson (a future James Bond?) has rarely taken the lead in the latter half of his career, not since his ‘Kick-Ass‘ era; he’s more of a supporting actor in films (‘Tenet‘, ‘Bullet Train‘, ‘The Fall Guy‘). This being his moment to shine in a leading capacity – and he’s wasted. I’m sure he was ‘kraven’ a project worth his energy.

Once the big bad has inevitably been dispatched, there’s a little bit at the end setting up a sequel…which is obviously not going ahead. Just a squandering of resources from everyone involved. Usually with these superhero blockbusters, there’s a post-credits scene to decipher. With ‘Kraven‘, none exist, probably because the writers thought nobody would stick around long enough to find out.

My rating: 4 / 10

Rumours (2024)

Director: Guy Maddin, Evan Johnson, Galen Johnson
Screenplay: Guy Maddin, Evan Johnson, Galen Johnson
Cast: Cate Blanchett, Charles Dance, Roy Dupuis, Denis Menochet, Nikki Amuka-Bird, Rolando Ravello, Takehiro Hira, Zlatko Buric, Alicia Vikander
Cinematography: Stefan Ciupek
Editing: John Gurdebeke, Evan Johnson, Galen Johnson
Score: Kristian Eidnes Andersen
Genre: Comedy horror
Runtime: 104 minutes

At the annual G7 conference, world leaders from the UK, US, France, Germany, Canada, Japan and Italy gather to write a statement regarding a recent crisis. What is this oh-so terrible predicament? We never find out directly but our group of politicians have a different emergency on their hands. Whilst out in a gazebo undertaking their assignment, night swiftly falls and all the staff vanishes. They’re left on their own with no connection to civilisation, so must traverse the dense, foggy forest to return to shelter. On their way, they encounter writhing bog zombies staggering in the mist. Oh, and a humongous brain. Anyone lost their mind? I think we’ve found it.

‘Rumours‘ takes the crown for the weirdest film of 2024 (a year in which sharks swam around the Colosseum in ‘Gladiator II‘ and Amy Adams transformed into a dog in ‘Nightbitch‘), I caught myself mouthing ‘what the f*ck?!’ more than a few times. The orchestral score is mesmerising, often playing as big a part as any of the cast, and in terms of visuals, it feels like one trippy descent into insanity, as if I’d dropped acid in the foyer and wandered in.

However, the experimental approach results in a lack of discernible plot, which meanders as though it went astray in the woodland, too. With a trio of writer-directors, you’d have thought one of them could muster up a comprehensible storyline. I guess they didn’t have the brains (try looking in the woods, you can’t miss it). And while I loved the ensemble nature of the troupe, the character development wasn’t thorough enough. It’s an attempt at satire and if there is a deeper meaning to nations banding together in the face of adversity, it got misplaced in the absurdity.

My rating: 5 / 10

Nightbitch (2024)

Director: Marielle Heller
Screenplay: Marielle Heller
Cast: Amy Adams, Scoot McNairy, Zoe Chao, Mary Holland, Ella Thomas, Archana Rajan, Jessica Harper
Cinematography: Brandon Trost
Editing: Anne McCabe
Score: Nate Heller
Genre: Black comedy
Runtime: 98 minutes

An unnamed mother (Amy Adams) to a messy 2 year-old boy wrestles with her feelings of inadequacy in her current situation; by becoming a mum, she’s had to give up her fruitful career as an artist. Could she have her cake and eat it? It doesn’t seem like that was an option; she has a husband, but he’s frequently away on work trips. Thus, she no longer feels her creative juices flowing, or even recognises who she is anymore. So far, so normal. One night though, she spots white hair growing on her back. Her teeth are sharper, and her sense of smell is heightened – she is literally transforming into a dog. Seriously.

The premise makes it sound way dafter than it actually is. I mean, it is often barking mad – I sat, mouth agape, as six-time Oscar nominee Adams dug a hole in her garden with her bare hands. Or when she growled at people in an upmarket restaurant. It’s a fearless performance, a round of a-paws to her for taking on such a bold and bizarre project, and having the confidence to deliver the line: “I could crush a walnut with my vagina.” without bursting into hysterics.

With Marielle Heller’s (the brilliant ‘Can You Ever Forgive Me?‘) skilful direction, it doesn’t end up as a dog’s dinner; it embraces the wacky concept with gusto. Thematically, it deals with motherhood and the notion of femininity head-on, celebrating women as life-givers, as the strongest of beings. The whole canine element turns the hackneyed ‘frazzled mother’ trope on its head, with many comic moments. It’s fur-fetched, but with meaning. We’re all animals deep down under the skin amidst the trappings of human life.

As the Helen Reddy song goes: “I am woman, hear me roar.” Well, in this case, growl.

My rating: 7 / 10

Conclave (2024)

Director: Edward Berger
Screenplay: Peter Straughan
Cast: Ralph Fiennes, Stanley Tucci, John Lithgow, Sergio Castellitto, Isabella Rossellini
Cinematography: Stéphane Fontaine
Editing: Nick Emerson
Score: Volker Bertelmann
Genre: Mystery thriller
Runtime: 120 minutes

Similar to how a potential president of the United States needs 270 electoral votes to win, a cardinal requires a specific number of votes to become the next Pope. This process is laborious and can take several days if the first round of voting doesn’t yield a clear winner. And like the aforementioned political election, it can get just as tangled; secrets are drawn out, accusations are flung around.

Featuring a top-tier cast – Misters Fiennes, Tucci and Lithgow as cardinals and Isabella Rossellini as a steely-eyed nun, ‘Conclave‘ is an incredibly engrossing watch – you never know who you can quite trust. Every cardinal has their foibles, some hold antiquated opinions – but where do you draw the line on who is honourable enough for the papacy?

It’s a fascinating look at a system so hidden from public view. Behind closed doors, the formalities are treated with the utmost sanctity and the level of secrecy puts me in mind of a holy Fort Knox. This film may be the only way us regular folk could ever bear witness to such events unfolding.

I liked cinematographer Stephane Fontaine’s use of empty space; I felt it heightened the isolation of the clergy from the outside world, as they’re already in seclusion for this conclave. Does the church have relevancy in modern times? It’s remarkable that this ostentatious, theatrical ceremony still occurs in the 21st century – it feels almost out of place in a digital era. There’s one particular shot of a cardinal clutching an iPhone, perhaps representing the church’s feeble attempt to keep up with the times. Fontaine also has an eye for colour; the red cassocks dominating the pale marble halls of the Sistine Chapel.

I would’ve given this my fabled 9/10 rating (I don’t give 10s, perfection is unattainable), but the twist at the end (bound to rile a few Catholics) came out of nowhere and completely threw me, with little resolution.

My rating: 8 / 10

Wicked (2024)

Director: Jon M. Chu
Screenplay: Winnie Holzman, Dana Fox
Cast: Cynthia Erivo, Ariana Grande, Jonathan Bailey, Ethan Slater, Bowen Yang, Marissa Bode, Peter Dinklage, Michelle Yeoh, Jeff Goldblum
Cinematography: Alice Brooks
Editing: Myron Kerstein
Score: John Powell, Stephen Schwartz
Genre: Musical fantasy
Runtime: 160 minutes

Oh my Oz! Here comes the epic cinematic adaptation of the hit musical. It’s the famous ‘Wizard of Oz‘ story taken from a different angle – the exploration of the backstory of the emerald-hued Elphaba, the iconic Wicked Witch of the West (played in this by Cynthia Erivo).

Turns out, she went to Shiz University alongside spoiled brat Galinda (Ariana Grande), the future Good Witch of the North. Immediately at odds with one another, they later bond in spite of the outright racism directly towards Elphaba and its potential to damage Galinda’s social status as queen bee. There’s shades of ‘Glee‘ (students casually breaking into song every five seconds) and ‘Legally Blonde‘ (Galinda perpetually clad in pink, Elle Woods-style, minus any of the charm).

The entire cast is note-perfect, especially Erivo. Maybe she should spend more time singing than getting butthurt about fan-made AI posters. The songs are catchy, the set pieces are stunning and there’s apt cameos from stage show originators Kristin Chenoweth and Idina Menzel (or is that Adele Dazeem?) – there’d be no ‘Wicked‘ without these talented leading ladies.

However, I take issue with the plot as a whole. When I saw the OG ‘Wizard of Oz‘ film aged 11 years old, I was enthralled by this technicolour fantasy world. ‘Wicked‘ takes everything involved with the original classic, adding a handful of new elements (such as the characters Madame Morrible and Nessarose), then chucks it all in a blender. This is what we’re left with. I feel it messes with the uncomplicated canonical storyline, beloved by many for generations.

A bladder-bursting 160 minutes long (even longer than the recent ‘Gladiator II‘), this is just the first half. ‘Wicked: Part 2‘ releases in November 2025 so instead of a short intermission to buy ice creams from the usherette tray, we have to wait a year to wrap this thing up. More Jeff Goldblum as the Wizard in the second half, please. That would be magic.

My rating: 5 / 10

Anora (2024)

Director: Sean Baker
Screenplay: Sean Baker
Cast: Mikey Madison, Mark Eydelshteyn, Yura Borisov, Karren Karagulian, Vache Tovmasyan
Cinematography: Drew Daniels
Editing: Sean Baker
Score: Matthew Hearon-Smith
Genre: Comedy-drama
Runtime: 139 minutes

‘Anora‘, Sean Baker’s latest in his string of tales of ‘adult performers’ (‘Starlet‘, ‘Tangerine‘, ‘Red Rocket‘), follows young stripper Anora (Mikey Madison), or ‘Ani’ for short, as she embarks on a whirlwind romance with Vanya, the son of a Russian oligarch who she meets in the strip club. He’s barely a grown up – his father has paid henchmen to watch over him and he’s incapable of even making his own bed.

In a space of mere weeks, Vanya proposes to Ani. She accepts, and they get hitched in a Vegas chapel. Turns out, he’s only after a green card – I called it pretty early on. News of their wedding reaches Vanya’s dad and, thus he sends his lackeys to annul the marriage tout suite. They turn up at the door, Vanya hightails it down the road, leaving his new bride to deal with the fallout.

Initially putting up a good fight against them, Ani reluctantly joins forces with the men in the search for Vanya, believing she can prove their love is genuine. What ensues is one long, compelling odyssey as the group trawl through possibly every nightclub in Brooklyn in the hunt for the wayward youth.

I struggle to find sympathy for Anora; whilst charming enough with her Brooklyn accent, she’s clearly wise beyond her years (Vanya thought she was older than she actually was) and has dealt with all sorts in her profession. So why didn’t she recognise Vanya as the utter man-child he was? And marrying someone you hardly know?! She sped past so many red flags, she may as well be a Formula One driver.

Although the character elicits no compassion from me, Mikey Madison’s performance anchors the film – she runs the gamut of emotions; naively optimistic, apoplectic, and ending with the sobering acceptance of the situation she’s found herself in. I won’t be surprised if Ms. Madison gets nominated for (and wins) the major awards this season.

My rating: 7 / 10

Gladiator II (2024)

Director: Ridley Scott
Screenplay: David Scarpa
Cast: Paul Mescal, Pedro Pascal, Joseph Quinn, Fred Hechinger, Lior Raz, Derek Jacobi, Connie Nielsen, Denzel Washington
Cinematography: John Mathieson
Editing: Claire Simpson, Sam Restivo
Score: Harry Gregson-Williams
Genre: Epic historical action
Runtime: 148 minutes

Before I watched the original ‘Gladiator‘ (2000), I had low expectations: 3 hours of Russell Crowe fighting Roman soldiers in an arena. Ugh. I was pleasantly surprised however. The acting from Joaquin Phoenix and Oliver Reed was mesmerising and the political scheming won me over.

I question the need for a sequel – the original’s ending was elegiac. Following a quarter of a century in development hell (including a draft written by Nick Cave which saw Maximus resurrected, made immortal and working at the Pentagon – wtf?!), this follow-up essentially treads the same path plot-wise as its predecessor.

We have our protagonist, Lucius (Paul Mescal), nephew of deceased evil Emperor Commodus (Phoenix) and thus heir to the throne. But he doesn’t know this yet – he’s a nobody, living on the Numidian coast with his wife. After losing the battle against the Roman army at the beginning, Lucius is taken into slavery – and just like his father – must become a gladiator to win his freedom. The ‘strength and honour’ motif and the musings on a glorious vision of Rome are so well-trodden by now, it’s impossible to find fresh meaning within them. Lucilla (Connie Nielsen, reprising her role from the first film), Lucius’ mother, yet again plots with the senate to overthrow the emperors – this time, a Romulus and Remus-type double act, who look as though they’re glam rock rejects.

If you’re going to parrot a storyline, at least ensure the performances are equal in quality too. While Mescal is fortunately a better actor than Russell Crowe, Pedro Pascal’s General Acacius barely makes a dent and Denzel Washington (playing arms dealer Macrinus) has a tenth of the gravitas of the late, great Oliver Reed. Nonetheless, as ever, Ridley Scott’s direction is masterful, the music (riffing on Hans Zimmer’s score from ‘Gladiator 1‘) is beautiful and the mix of politics and well-choreographed fight scenes guarantees a worthwhile watch. Are you not entertained? I’d say I was.

Pay the bathroom a visit beforehand – it’s two and a half hours long, about 20 minutes shy of the previous movie’s runtime.

My rating: 6 / 10

Blitz (2024)

Director: Steve McQueen
Screenwriter: Steve McQueen
Cast: Saoirse Ronan, Harris Dickinson, Elliot Heffernan, Benjamin Clementine, Kathy Burke, Paul Weller, Stephen Graham
Cinematography: Yorick Le Saux
Editing: Peter Sciberras
Score: Hans Zimmer
Genre: Historical war drama
Runtime: 120 minutes

London 1940: the city is being pounded continuously by German bombs. A war zone is not the best environment for children so Rita (Saoirse Ronan, flawless Cockney accent) sends her mixed-race son George (Elliot Heffernan) to the safety of the English countryside along with other evacuated kids, but so reluctant is he to be separated from his family, he throws himself off the moving train. We follow him on his exhilarating journey back to the fiery hellscape London has degenerated into, meanwhile, his mother desperately searches for him, having been notified of his disappearance in transit.

George’s adventure home acts as an exploration of his racial identity with the help of kindly air raid warden Ife (Benjamin Clementine). George is isolated from his peers in the respect that he’s braved this daring voyage all on his own but also detached from them due to their appalling racist taunts (the adults aren’t setting a good example though). This treatment of people based on their skin color by a select few in the UK mirrors the fascistic behaviour of Nazi Germany, although in the latter country, the persecution of persons of colour resulted in their deaths. So much for the famed wartime ‘Blitz Spirit’, where Brits of different creeds were supposed to band together stoically with a sense of morale and forge ahead as a single nation, undivided.

The film is incredibly relevant to modern times; the imagery, particularly one aerial shot of London post-bombing, could easily be mistaken for Gaza or Kyiv in 2024. A frenetic opening sequence taking place immediately after a bomb has hit simulates journalists’ footage from the front line; it’s art sadly imitating life.

Director/writer Steve McQueen has created a harrowing portrait of war-torn Britain – within it a powerful statement on racial identity in a country not fully embracing of ethnic minorities – bolstered by Hans Zimmer’s score and impeccable period detail.

My rating: 8 / 10

Red One (2024)

Director: Jake Kasdan
Screenplay: Chris Morgan
Cast: Dwayne Johnson, Chris Evans, Lucy Liu, J.K. Simmons, Kiernan Shipka, Bonnie Hunt, Kristofer Hivju, Nick Kroll
Cinematography: Dan Mindel
Editing: Mark Helfrich, Steve Edwards, Tara Timpone
Score: Henry Jackman
Genre: Christmas action adventure comedy
Runtime: 123 minutes

It’s Christmaaaaaasssssss! It’s actually the 6th of November as I’m writing this, which is ludicrously early to begin thinking about the big day. There are two types of people; those who start planning the festivities practically in September, and those who sensibly wait until closer to the holiday. I’m in the latter camp – for me, the merry season begins mid-December. ‘Red One‘ is released in the States on November 15th, which is slightly more reasonable than across the pond (we only just had Halloween last week). Sleigh it ain’t so!

Anyway, Santa gets kidnapped by an evil witch up to snow good and it’s down to the chalk and cheese duo of Dwayne Johnson’s gruff North Pole security chief and Chris Evan’s deadbeat hacker to rescue him in time for Christmas Day. Santa (an underutilised J.K. Simmons, in a role he was surely born to play) lifts weight – you’ve never seen old Saint Nick in quite this way before. Throw in a jacked Krampus and we’ve got a veritable sausage fest.

Every festive trope is ticked off; elves, sleigh rides, mahoosive CGI reindeer – but the Yuletide spirit is nowhere to be felt. Again, the premature release date may be a factor but the recent Christmas-set ‘Terrifier 3‘ got me in the Xmas mood and that came out weeks ago. The routine ‘everyone has the choice to be a better person’ dialogue falls flat (when delivered by Evans towards the climax) but the movie isn’t a lost Claus though; the comedic interplay between Johnson and Evans and the spectacular visuals make it a watchable popcorn adventure.

The agency MORA (Mythological Oversight and Restoration Authority), headed up by Lucy Liu’s character, allows scope for a potential franchise involving other seasonal-based mythology. An Easter-themed entry could work (think supersized bunnies and monstrous spring chicks) – ‘Egg One’, perhaps?

My rating: 6 / 10

Small Things like These (2024)

Director: Tim Mielants
Screenwriter: Enda Walsh
Cast: Cillian Murphy, Eileen Walsh, Michelle Fairley, Emily Watson, Clare Dunne, Helen Behan
Cinematography: Frank van den Eeden
Editing: Alain Dessauvage
Score: Senjan Jansen
Genre: Historical drama
Runtime: 98 minutes

Based on Claire Keegan’s Orwell Prize-winning novel, ‘Small Things like These‘ deals with a dirty big stain on Ireland’s history – the Magdalene laundries. These institutions, run by the church, took in ‘fallen women’ (such as unmarried mothers or prostitutes) and effectively held them prisoner, forcing them to work till the point of collapse. Unbelievably, this form of modern slavery was still occurring until 1998 (almost the 21st century!), the year the last laundry closed down.

The film looks at events from an outsider’s perspective, and a male one too, which I found a curious choice. Coal merchant Bill Furlong (Cillian Murphy, in his first role post-Oscars win) is preparing for Christmas with his wife and five daughters when he discovers a young woman cowering in the shed next to the local convent. By alerting the nuns to her existence, he’s pretty much led her into captivity. Consequently, Bill silently wrestles with feelings of guilt – did he do the right thing by her? She’ll have a roof over her head, be fed and ‘looked after’. He knows what the nuns are up to – everybody does. It’s an open secret. But nobody dares challenge them as they’re too influential in the community. Bill is also plagued by flashbacks of his mother’s death when he was a boy – she too was a ‘fallen women’ (an unmarried mother) yet she was taken in by a kind-hearted lady (Michelle Fairley), allowing her to raise her son comfortably.

Murphy gives a superbly haunted performance; you can see the trauma in his eyes, while Emily Watson is unnerving as the Mother Superior of the convent. It’s bleak and hard-hitting. I feel as though Ireland is only just beginning to process this shameful chapter in its past. An overdue dedication to the 56,000 women (and the babies) lost to the Magdalene laundries between 1922 and 1998 appears at the end while the sound of crows cawing and children giggling plays over the closing credits, adding a certain chill.

My rating: 7 / 10

Juror #2 (2024)

Director: Clint Eastwood
Screenwriter: Jonathan Abrams
Cast: Nicholas Hoult, Toni Collette, J.K. Simmons, Chris Messina, Zoey Deutch, Kiefer Sutherland
Cinematographer: Yves Bélanger
Editing: Joel Cox, David Cox
Score: Mark Mancina
Genre: Legal thriller
Runtime: 114 minutes

This may well be Clint Eastwood’s last project in any capacity; whether in front of, or behind the camera. He’s 94 after all. It’s possibly working on this movie that’s kept his mind focused, and therefore, alive.

The story concerns a murder trial; a man is accused of murdering his girlfriend (her body is discovered by a hiker below a bridge). The couple had had a disagreement in a bar one night and when the girlfriend stormed off, he followed her outside. The man, who was witnessed being aggressive towards her, is guilty in the majority of the jury’s eyes – the irony here is that the young woman is played by director’s daughter Francesca Eastwood, who was recently arrested for domestic violence.

Justin Kemp (Nicholas Hoult) believes the man’s innocence but only because…Kemp actually committed the crime himself, initially thinking he’d just hit a deer with his car. As this is revealed early on, we see his attempt to sway the unanimous jury to reconsider their dogmatic view of the accused and save an innocent soul from spending the rest of his life in prison. 12 Angry Men? 1 Guilty Man.

With a solid supporting cast (Toni Collette as the ambitious prosecutor running for District Attorney, and Chris Messina as the defence), ‘Juror #2‘ is an excellent courtroom drama, and beautifully shot; fans of the genre will appreciate Eastwood’s take on it. It makes you think about the consequences if the guilt-ridden Kemp turned himself in; he and his partner are expecting a baby a year on from a miscarriage – would he be depriving that child of a father figure? Would this be a worse outcome for the community? It reminds me of Superman’s slogan: ‘Truth, Justice, and the American Way’. Are truth and justice mutually exclusive?

Should it be so, ‘Juror #2‘ serves as a respectable final entry in the filmography of the legendary Mr. Eastwood.

My rating: 8 / 10

Heretic (2024)

Director: Scott Beck, Bryan Woods
Screenwriter: Scott Beck, Bryan Woods
Cast: Hugh Grant, Sophie Thatcher, Chloe East
Cinematography: Chung Chung-hoon
Editing: Justin Li
Score: Chris Bacon
Genre: Horror thriller
Runtime: 111 minutes

When a pair of naive Mormon missionary girls knock on his door in a bid to convert him to their cause, Mr. Reed (Hugh Grant) invites them in under the pretence he has a wife (it’s a rule of the young women that they must have another female present in the room). He doesn’t, of course, have said spouse. The girls don’t know what they’ve got themselves into.

Come into my parlour, said the spider to the fly.

It’s a movie of two halves; and with two writers/directors, it makes you wonder if they worked on separate halves and stitched them together, Frankenstein’s monster-style. The first half, wherein the missionaries are lured into Reed’s house like lambs to the slaughter and he begins to challenge their religious beliefs is rather gripping; you could cut the tension with a breadknife. He lectures them on how there’s no one true religion and that they’re all variations of each other, but does so using pop culture metaphors (such as different editions of Monopoly) as a way of making it accessible – I never thought I’d be hearing Hugh Grant ‘sing’ a few bars of Radiohead’s ‘Creep‘ or do a woeful Jar Jar Binks impersonation, yet here we are. He then forces the pair into some kind of psychological game, marking two identical doors as ‘belief’ and ‘disbelief’ and tasking them to choose one if they want to leave. It’s ‘Saw‘ but instead of Jigsaw at the helm, it’s Grant, putting a sinister twist on his usual bumbling, English toff persona.

The latter half, once the choice of which door to walk through has been made, is weighed down by theological mumbo jumbo and drivel about miracles and resurrections. It’s not for me; I’m too scientifically minded to take in any of this hogwash, I believe in logic as opposed to a god. It would’ve been a better film had it kept up the tense atmosphere and not devolved into a holy commotion – ‘Heretic‘ is hardly manna from heaven.

My rating: 5 / 10

The Front Room (2024)

Director: Max Eggers, Sam Eggers
Screenwriter: Max Eggers, Sam Eggers
Cast: Brandy, Kathryn Hunter, Andrew Burnap, Neal Huff
Cinematography: Ava Berkofsky
Editing: Benjamin Rodriguez Jr., Eric Kissack
Score: Marcelo Zarvos
Genre: Psychological horror
Runtime: 95 minutes

When his father dies, Norman (Andrew Burnap) and his expectant wife Belinda (Brandy, the singer) are requested to take in his stepmother Solange as per his father’s will, if they do so they’ll benefit from her large inheritance and given that they’re in dire straits financially, they really have no choice. Solange (Kathryn Hunter) is a religious zealot that would make Mother Teresa look like a heathen. She also openly shares her entrenched racist views at the dinner table, clashing with Belinda (or ‘Belinder’ as she calls her).

So: money troubles, a baby on the way and the mother-in-law from hell…not exactly a picture-perfect marital home. Solange is incontinent (if that didn’t worsen an already awful situation) – she’s soiling herself every 5 seconds, seemingly to spite Belinda. Norman refuses to get his hands dirty (literally), always running off to work when things are messy. And Solange’s fervent religiousness has a supernatural effect on the household. Holy moly.

Brandy gives an underpowered performance – conversely, Kathryn Hunter absolutely devours the scenery as the monster-in-law, embarrassingly so (this is an actress who’s done Shakespeare at the Globe Theatre). It’s more of an unintended comedy than the ‘psychological horror’ it set out to be. There’s a million Les Dawson jokes about his mother-in-law but this movie is funnier than all of them (not saying much though). In fact, it’s the cinematic equivalent of hot garbage. Praise the lord it’s only 95 minutes long.

Why didn’t Belinda just shove the old bat down the stairs as soon as she could? It wouldn’t have been the first time Brandy had killed someone…

My rating: 3 / 10

Venom: The Last Dance (2024)

Director: Kelly Marcel
Screenwriter: Kelly Marcel
Cast: Tom Hardy, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Juno Temple, Rhys Ifans, Stephen Graham, Peggy Lu, Clark Backo, Alanna Ubach
Cinematography: Fabian Wagner
Editing: Mark Sanger
Score: Dan Deacon
Genre: Superhero
Runtime: 109 minutes

Following the chaos of ‘Venom: Let There Be Carnage‘, Eddie Brock (and Venom) are fugitives hiding out in Mexico. In a bid to clear Brock’s name in New York City, the pair take a road trip of sorts to get there. I can’t fathom spending any time with the annoying symbiote, constantly wisecracking with a gravelly Christian Bale-esque voice. Throw me out the van, please.

Hot on their trail are government soldiers (led by Chiwetel Ejiofor), intent on capturing Venom for their research on alien symbiotes, aided by Area 51 scientists (Juno Temple and Clark Backo). Meanwhile, some imprisoned evil force seeks ‘the Codex’, the vaguest of MacGuffins created once a symbiote brings its host back to life (which happened to Eddie in the original ‘Venom‘). This confusing bad guy lore bogs the movie down; it works better when there’s action sequences, especially the final showdown within the Area 51 compound. Another highlight is Rhys Ifans’ extraterrestrial-obsessed hippie and his family the duo meet en route.

The only other returning characters from the first two ‘Venoms‘ are Mulligan (Stephen Graham, bridging the gap between the previous installment and this film) and Mrs. Chen, the convenience store owner who randomly pops up in Las Vegas, clearly living her best life. Gone is the emotional baggage of Eddie’s broken relationship with Anne Weying. Instead, we have the symbiosis of Eddie and his old friend and its looming conclusion. Their ‘last dance’. I say ‘old friend’; it transpires the events of the trilogy have occurred in the space of a single year. Madness.

A schmaltzy goodbye later…but before long, there’s not one, but two post-credits scenes that undo this rare attempt to end a franchise by setting up a future storyline. I mean, I’m not surprised but this Hollywood trend of pumping needless sequels out is tiresome.

My rating: 5 / 10

The Apprentice (2024)

Director: Ali Abbasi
Screenplay: Gabriel Sherman
Cast: Sebastian Stan, Jeremy Strong, Martin Donovan, Maria Bakalova
Cinematography: Kasper Tuxen
Editing: Olivier Bugge Coutté, Olivia Neergaard-Holm
Score: Martin Dirkov
Genre: Biographical drama
Runtime: 123 minutes

The timing of this biopic of the 45th POTUS couldn’t be more appropriate. With less than a month to go until election day, this warts-and-all biographical drama documents his rise to prominence in 1970s New York City under the wing of crooked lawyer Roy Cohn (Jeremy Strong). ‘The Apprentice‘ (also the name of Trump’s NBC reality series) shows us his human side (yes, he has one); his flaws, his vulnerabilities. He starts off as an outsider, not taken seriously but ruthlessly driven to succeed in the business world. You almost feel sorry for him. Almost. The movie doesn’t hold a particular political stance – we see his unsavoury attributes; his cold-heartedness, his sleaziness, his absolute disregard for his first wife Ivana. Orange man bad? Well…

Sebastian Stan gives a stellar performance as Donald J. Trump, one of the most famous people on the planet (the pressure to get it right must’ve been intense). While he could easily have done an ‘SNL‘ skit-style take on Trump (Alec Baldwin anyone?), Stan completely immerses himself in the role. There were times I genuinely thought I was watching Trump on the big screen and had to remind myself this was just acting. He’s got the voice, the hand gestures; it threw me off the instant he started speaking. Jeremy Strong is a solid supporting actor as the corrupt and downright evil Cohn, who is the Obi-Wan figure to Trump’s Luke Skywalker, teaching him to win at all costs.

It’s got the feeling of an extended episode of ‘Succession‘ (which Strong starred in too); the camera zooming in like a pseudo-documentary and razor-sharp lines of dialogue; the grainy 70s lens is a nice touch as well. Pseudo indeed – there’s a disclaimer at the start saying many of the events are fictitious (‘fake news’), presumably so Trump can’t sue the writers. He’ll call them a disgrace to screenwriting on Truth Social instead.

Will this sway the American voters in any way? Probably not, but it does make you consider the real person behind the larger-than-life persona. It’s worth noting that Trump’s legal team tried to block the film’s release so the makers had to distribute it through Briarcliff Entertainment, an independent production company.

My rating: 8 / 10

Smile 2 (2024)

Director: Parker Finn
Screenplay: Parker Finn
Cast: Naomi Scott, Rosemarie DeWitt, Miles Gutierrez-Riley, Dylan Gelula, Raul Castillo, Peter Jacobson, Ray Nicholson, Lukas Gage, Kyle Gallner
Cinematography: Charlie Sarroff
Editing: Elliot Greenberg
Score: Cristobal Tapia de Veer
Genre: Psychological supernatural horror
Runtime: 127 minutes

Set 6 days after the sequel-baiting ending of ‘Smile‘ (2022), we watch in horror as the chain of deaths caused by the supernatural curse continues. Said affliction (which causes the victim to have hallucinations of people demonically smiling, then later commit suicide) has reached global singing sensation Skye Riley (Naomi Scott) who’s having a rough time of it; she’s had a history of substance abuse and is haunted by the death of her boyfriend in a car crash (which she survived).

It’s the exact same premise as the first Smile; but the troubled pop star element was an interesting angle to explore as Skye, literally tearing her hair out worrying about the curse, and her decline in mental health reflects the life of a young singer in the spotlight, especially when they’re desperately trying to keep a squeaky-clean image in a social media age. I still can’t take it seriously though. Folks smiling creepily at you? Laughable. The only actor that pulls off the menacing grin is Ray Nicholson, son of the legendary Jack Nicholson (heeeere’s Johnny!).

Parker Finn’s trademark upside down aerial shots give it a trippy feel, and Skye Riley treats us to a couple of polished pop bangers plus choreography. Drew Barrymore appears in a cameo appearance as her talk show host self but thankfully she’s not practically in her guest’s lap as usual. A meagre amount of frights later, the wheels fall off big time in the third act, and while I won’t spoil anything here, the cliffhanger finale is a bit of a game changer. How the hell are they gonna resolve the situation in the inevitable Smile 3?

A slight improvement on the original – but that one was so dire I was praying for it to be over and done with. I had to grin and bear it. Faint praise indeed.

My rating: 4 / 10

‘Salem’s Lot (2024)

Director: Gary Dauberman
Screenplay: Gary Dauberman
Cast: Lewis Pullman, Makenzie Leigh, Alfre Woodward, John Benjamin Hickey, Bill Camp, Spencer Treat Clark, William Sadler, Pilou Asbæk
Cinematography: Michael Burgess
Editing: Luke Ciarrocchi
Score: Nathan Barr, Lisbeth Scott
Genre: Supernatural horror
Runtime: 113 minutes

A somewhat famous writer, Ben Mears (Lewis Pullman), revisits the town in Maine which he grew up in order to spark some inspiration. Jerusalem’s Lot (the ‘Jeru’ having been worn away on the welcome sign) has that quintessential small-town America feel…except there’s a vampire on the loose. Mears and his band of two-dimensional friends have to defeat the bloodsucking beast, which resembles a CGI-ed Nosferatu. Henceforth, any attempt at crafting Mears’ emotional backstory is promptly disregarded in favour of battling vampires instead. The talented Alfre Woodard and Bill Camp, playing the local doctor and school teacher respectively, are wasted – reduced to spouting terrible lines of dialogue like a couple of suckers.

Every single vampire cliché you can think of is thrown around; wooden stakes through the heart, they’re allergic to sunlight, no reflection in the mirror etc.; I lost count of how many times I rolled my eyes. And the obvious jumpscares – even Stevie Wonder could’ve seen them coming.

Curiously, the movie was shot way back in 2021 and went through reshoots and years of postponed potential release dates. Maybe the producers saw the rough cut and thought ‘Oh god it’s so bad but people might forget we’re making it if we never release it.”. Perhaps they were trying to spare us from this cinematic slog. According to director Gary Dauberman, the initial edit lasted three hours before they (thankfully) chopped it down to 113 minutes. Bleeding hell…can you imagine?

I’d consider it to be one of the worst Stephen King book-to-film adaptations I’ve come across. ‘Salem’s Lot? A lot of tripe more like. Fangs for nothing!

My rating: 3 / 10

Terrifier 3 (2024)

Director: Damien Leone
Screenplay: Damien Leone
Cast: David Howard Thornton, Lauren LaVera, Elliott Fullam, Samantha Scaffidi
Cinematography: George Steuber
Editing: Damien Leone
Score: Paul Wiley
Genre: Christmas supernatural slasher
Runtime: 125 minutes

Silent night, holy fright!

Who’s dressed in a suit and got a big bag full of treats for all the good boys and girls? Santa Claus? Hell no! It’s Art the Clown!

In this Christmas-flavoured third entry in the cult slasher franchise, Art’s back to finish what he started in the previous movie – to kill ‘final girl’ Sienna Shaw. Set five years after Sienna’s first tangle with the killer clown, she’s recently been released from psychiatric care and recuperating at her aunt and uncle’s house.

The kills are gruesomely inventive as ever and the stomach-churning practical effects would make Tom Savini proud (he actually has a cameo as a eyewitness on television news). There’s a scattering of darkly amusing moments; one especially seasonal – Art making blood angels instead of those of snow.

My main problem is with Art the Clown. Though visually creepy and certainly a welcome addition to the modern horror movie villain canon, I find his execution flawed. If you’re going to do the whole ‘silent but deadly’ thing, constantly gurning and scowling means I won’t be able to take you seriously. And maybe that’s the point; he’s meant to be a little goofy. But herein lies another issue – if you’re a deliberately campy character (à la Freddy Krueger), at least have enough panache to pull it off – Krueger could do his over-the-top shtick and terrible one-liners AND still be genuinely terrifying. Adding an accomplice into the mix in the form of Vicky, the deranged survivor of ‘Terrifier 1‘, detracts from Art’s presence and power as the big bad, too.

The unnecessary supernatural elements in the plot are a distraction from what could’ve been a more straightforward gore-fest, tipping an already pretty silly story into the territory of the downright ridiculous.

My rating: 6 / 10

Never Let Go (2024)

Director: Alexandre Aja
Screenwriter: Kevin Coughlin, Ryan Grassby
Cast: Halle Berry, Percy Daggs IV, Anthony B. Jenkins
Cinematography: Maxime Alexandre
Editing: Elliot Greenberg
Score: Robin Coudert
Genre: Survival horror thriller
Runtime: 101 minutes

There’s often rules in horror movies that you have to follow in order to live. In ‘A Quiet Place’, you survive by not making a sound. In ‘Bird Box’, you commit suicide if you see the creatures so must remain blindfolded. In ‘Never Let Go‘, it’s by touch that ‘they’ get you, if they do you’ll turn against your family in a murderous rage.

After society apparently collapses, a mother (Halle Berry, doing a poor attempt at a Southern accent) and her two young sons live in a cabin in the woods, surviving in their remote locale by foraging for food and hunting animals. But there’s ‘evil’ lurking in the surrounding forestry (taking various forms, among them; Berry’s late husband and a zombified, serpentine version of her mother) so when venturing outside, the trio must tie ropes around themselves – thus remaining connected to their home – as these seemingly magic ropes (yes, really) have the power to protect them from these malevolent forces (initially only witnessed by Berry’s character).

There’s little to no threat – you won’t be left with a knot in your stomach. Despite the ropes being bound tightly, the tension is lax while the dialogue is ropey at best. It keeps you guessing whether it actually is the end of the world or not (similar to last year’s ‘Knock at the Cabin‘- what is it with apocalypses and cabins?) but that only depends if you haven’t already given up and let go.

Even so, the verdant cinematography is the movie’s saving grace, creating a natural, environmental feel and featuring arboreal set pieces.

My rating: 4 / 10

Joker: Folie à Deux (2024)

Director: Todd Phillips
Screenwriter: Scott Silver, Todd Phillips
Cast: Joaquin Phoenix, Lady Gaga, Brendan Gleeson, Catherine Keener, Zazie Beetz, Steve Coogan, Harry Lawtey
Cinematography: Lawrence Sher
Editing: Jeff Groth
Score: Hildur Gudnadóttir
Genre: Jukebox musical psychological thriller
Runtime: 138 minutes

Step right up, folks. ‘Joker‘ (2019) earned over a billion dollars at the box office; whether it’s a good decision to make a sequel or not is irrelevant – those figures ain’t clowning around. It certainly has big (clown) shoes to fill. This follow up, set two years later, more or less fills them – but throws us an almighty curveball; it’s (partly) a musical. Lightning seemingly never strikes twice so recapturing everything that made the first film brilliant was always going to be a mission. So why not do something radical with the previous concept?

It’s a juggling act of genres; aforementioned musical segments (comprised of show tunes from yesteryear), bleak prison drama and courtroom thriller. While it retains the gritty realness of the original, the songs feel out of place somewhat. They aren’t thrown in for the sake of it, it makes sense narratively as they’re portrayed as Arthur Fleck / Joker’s flights of fancy whilst withering away in jail awaiting trial for murder. It’s the way they’re used I had an issue with. “Why so serious?” Heath Ledger’s incarnation of the Joker would ask. Director/screenwriter Todd Phillips has clearly taken this mentality to heart because… after a bout of dramatic acting… *bang* we have a whimsical all-singing, all-dancing number in Fleck’s head. I’m not sure I could really take the movie seriously as I felt like they sanded down the sharp edges these tense scenes had created.

Send in the clowns.

That said, the show tunes and their retro setting serve as a pop of colour to contrast with the grimy palette of the prison corridors. Phoenix gives as intense a performance as his Oscar-winning turn in the first film and Lady Gaga, playing his love interest Harleen ‘Lee’ Quinzel, surprised me – I’ve never rated her as an actress (not least her bizarre Russian accent in ‘House of Gucci‘), but perhaps it’s because it involved singing in some capacity that she fits in well here. In terms of the vocals, Gaga easily outperforms Phoenix, her voice lends itself to the jazzy/gospel soundtrack naturally.

Although enthralling, the court scenes did drag on just a smidge. But it’s Phoenix’s moment and, as the song goes, there’s always a joker in the pack.

My rating: 7 / 10

The Critic (2023)

Director: Anand Tucker
Screenplay: Patrick Marber
Cast: Ian McKellen, Gemma Arterton, Mark Strong, Ben Barnes, Alfred Enoch, Romola Garai, Lesley Manville
Cinematography: David Higgs
Editing: Beverley Mills
Score: Craig Armstrong
Genre: Period thriller
Runtime: 101 minutes

Seeing a film called ‘The Critic‘ then writing a critique of it afterwards felt very appropriate. Who dares to criticise the critic? Well, I’m sure the people who created this yawnfest won’t appreciate my opinions in any shape or form.

Ian McKellen is Jimmy Erskine, a theatre critic with an acid tongue and a poison pen. Through his harsh but honest reviews, he wields power over the actors of London’s theatres. Erskine is waspish and tart, McKellen does this so well it’s as if he’s not even acting – he gets to deliver a few Oscar Wilde-esques lines.

What follows is a major disappointment – not the film I was expecting at all. Billed as a thriller, it’s more of a romantic drama with a hint of threat. Erskine is fired because of cost-cutting measures at the newspaper he’s the resident entertainment critic of, along with the rest of the old guard. Thus, he plots his revenge against newspaper editor David Brooke (Mark Strong), using actress Nina Land (Gemma Arterton) as a pawn in his game. But about a third of the way through, McKellen is no longer the focus – the love triangle between David, Nina and David’s son-in-law (Ben Barnes) takes centre stage. By not focusing on its main asset, I lost interest quickly. They could have made Erskine’s homosexuality (illegal in 1934, when this is set) more of a plot point than it was (it’s touched on in the first part) – this would allow him extra screentime and possibly add an interesting angle to it. McKellen is 85, I hope this doesn’t constitute a flat coda in his esteemed career. At least he didn’t off fall the stage here.

It’s mercifully not an overlong runtime – I’m glad; I was starting to doze off towards the end…

My rating: 3 / 10

Strange Darling (2023)

Director: JT Mollner
Screenwriter: JT Mollner
Cast: Willa Fitzgerald, Kyle Gallner, Barbara Hershey, Ed Begley Jr.
Cinematography: Giovanni Ribisi
Editing: Christopher Robin Bell
Score: Craig DeLeon
Genre: Thriller
Runtime: 96 minutes

We’ve got 6 chapters in this story of a one-night stand gone wrong, they’re all jumbled up and out of sequence (apart from Chapter 6, which closes the tale). It concerns a hookup between a man (Kyle Gallner) and a woman (Willa Fitzgerald) that has dire consequences for both parties, but done so through an arthouse lens.

Movies that use nonlinear plots are taking a risk with the audience’s patience and comprehension – the clever ones can get away with it. This wasn’t inventive or distinct enough to pull this storytelling technique off however. It’s an attempt to do something artsy with a narrative about a serial killer (who may or may not be real, director JT Mollner is cagey on the inspiration in interviews).

Whilst initially engaging, with each chapter title card flashing up (accompanied by an excerpt of classical music), I grew a little weary. At the start, which – of course – is Chapter 3, we see Fitzgerald’s character (simply named ‘The Lady’) fleeing from a man (credited as ‘The Demon’, played by Gallner). Then comes Chapters 5, 1, 4, 2, then 6. The twisty plot means we don’t follow a simple path and this allows the whole story to be turned up on its head – but this didn’t land the blow it intended (I question everything) and I didn’t feel the characters were compelling enough for me to care about what happens to them. The dynamic between the duo was interesting in Chapter 1 and I liked the neon blue lighting of the motel they’ve parked outside of; the way the light flooded the car. Gallner does his best with the material he’s given but by the sixth chapter, Fitzgerald is slightly irritating, almost as much as the soppy soundtrack.

Strange Darling? More like strained, darling.

My rating: 5 / 10

The Substance (2024)

Director: Coralie Fargeat
Screenplay: Coralie Fargeat
Cast: Demi Moore, Margaret Qualley, Dennis Quaid
Cinematography: Benjamin Kracun
Editing: Coralie Fargeat, Jérôme Eltabet, Valentin Feron
Score: Raffertie
Genre: Satirical body horror
Runtime: 140 minutes

Ever wanted to be younger? More beautiful? More perfect? You may want to try ‘the substance’, a greenish liquid that, when injected, creates ‘a better’ version of yourself, with a whole other body gorily birthed out of your back.

Elisabeth Sparkle (Demi Moore), a washed up actress who was once a somebody (she’s an Oscar winner and has a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame), is fired from her job as the face of an aerobics television show (reminiscent of 80s Jane Fonda) on her 50th birthday. In an industry obsessed with looks, she feels the pressure to be youthful and ‘attractive’ so injects herself with this dodgy serum she collects from an alley. The result – a perkier, younger avatar named Sue (Margaret Qualley). Heads turn as she walks down the street, she replaces Elisabeth on TV without even a glance at a resume. She’s ‘perfect’, as least as conventional beauty standards go.

Both actresses give fearless, body-baring performances. I was initially dubious about the casting of Demi Moore; she’s still in great shape so the idea of Elisabeth being past her prime in any way seemed moot. But it made sense down the line as, when things inevitably take a bad turn, she realised how good she had it before in spite of what chauvinistic bigwigs might say. Lesson learned – don’t try to cheat the aging process. Dennis Quaid is also well cast as the sleazy producer of the show (it can’t be a coincidence his character is named Harvey…).

My metaphorical hat goes off to director/screenwriter Coralie Fargeat. She’s created something that’s bold, blackly comic, and totally bizarre – the most grotesque body transformation since David Cronenberg’s ‘The Fly‘. The cinematography is sublime; endless corridors and shots of palm trees flicking between day and night highlighting the dichotomy between the two women. It completely demolishes any preconceived beauty standards the western world has and puts a spotlight on the sexism and ageism women over a certain age face in a way that’s tragic yet totally batshit crazy at the same time.

At the start, Elisabeth receives a flash drive telling her about ‘the substance’, it comes with a note reading: ‘this will change your life’ – I think this daring piece of film-making will do the same. I’ve never been so glad to be comfortable in my own skin.

My rating: 9 / 10