- Director: Paul W.S. Anderson
- Screenplay: Constantin Werner
- Cast: Dave Bautista, Milla Jovovich, Arly Jover
- Cinematography: Glen MacPherson
- Editing: Niven Howie
- Score: Paul Haslinger
- Genre: Epic dark fantasy
- Runtime: 101 minutes
A George R.R. Martin short story stretched out into a feature length film, ‘In the Lost Lands’ follows a witch, Gray Alys, tasked by a queen to acquire the powers of a werewolf by killing a shapeshifter. To succeed in her quest, Alys (Jovovich), must traverse the treacherous post-apocalyptic wilderness (the titular ‘Lost Lands’) with the aid of a hunter, Boyce (Bautista).
It’s a peculiar hybrid of quasi-medieval fantasy and a Western, so it seems ridiculous that whenever someone brandishes a sword, Boyce merely whips out his gun and shoots them dead.
Bautista has slimmed down since his playing the hulking Drax in the ‘Guardians of the Galaxy‘ series and with this weight loss comes a deficiency of onscreen presence. It puts me in mind of the biblical Samson after his haircut. I mean, he doesn’t exactly have any acting chops to rely on to command attention. Imagine if Arnold Schwarzenegger didn’t possess his gym-built physique – he’d be reduced to just a guy with a thick Austrian accent. Milla Jovovich, the other lead, is only there because her husband is the director (as is the case for most of his films, the ‘Resident Evil‘ franchise included). She hasn’t learned how to close her mouth, which is incredibly distracting – and she sports facial tattoos.
Dingy and dull, I didn’t care whether the characters lived or died. With all this talk of the mystical ‘Lost Lands’, what I wanted to know was: what else was lost? The plot? Decent dialogue? The ability to craft a movie that didn’t underwhelm me? A lost cause, for sure.
My rating: 4 / 10
SilverScreen 